Right at the moment she left the smoke fill her bronchi, she didn’t realize the woman standing next to her.
«I thought you quit?»
Bette was taken aback. She started to cough, «What… God, hey Tina» she managed to say, still coughing.
«I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you but I knocked and you didn’t hear me, so I guessed you were in the back and here you are… Are you okay?» she asked concerned.
«Um, yeah… Yeah, I am fine» she said in a choking voice, putting out the cigarette.
«Okay, so, um you wanted to talk, right?»
Bette took a deep breath, «Right».

The two women made their way inside and Tina made herself comfortable sitting on the couch. She looked around the living room, enjoying the sight. Bette’s taste was impeccable. Everything was like when she left a year before.
Except for their pictures of them together… they weren’t there.
Well, what she could expect?
The sense of sadness that reached her was unbearable. And it was fed by the fact that she had no idea what Bette wanted to talk to her about. But, sadly, she could feel in her gut, it wasn’t good.

Bette approached her and handed her former partner a cup of tea and sat in the chair in front of the couch, that way she could face her.
An awkward silence fell above them, it was killing Tina.
The blonde looked at her, without uttering a word, her eyes begged her to talk. ‘I wonder what she’s struggling with, she looks so lost’.
Bette looked down and inhaled a large amount of air. She lift her head and before she could start, noticed Tina’s shoulders were shaking.
The woman before her was silently crying, it broke her heart.
It was making everything more difficult.
«Tina, I —»
The southern beauty raised her hand to make her stop talking. «Wait! Please…» she kept crying and between one sob and another she asked Bette to hold her. Just for a little bit.
The dean did as she’d been asked. She stood up and immediately putted her arms around the sobbing woman. She inhaled her scent as she rocked her to calm her down. ‘She smells so good’.
None of the two uttered a word.

They finally pulled out, after Tina managed to recompose herself. «I’m sorry, I didn’t want to do this… Fuck» she avoided her gaze.
«You don’t need to be sorry… It’s my fault» the brunette admitted.
«So? What did you want to talk about?»
Bette swallowed the lump that’s formed in her throat. «Now it’s everything more difficult»
«Why? Because I cried? It’s not a big deal, I don’t want your pity.»
The mocha skinned finally managed to look into her eyes. «I don’t know how to say it»
«Oh come on, Bette. Just say it… You’re having second thoughts, right?» it hurt admitting it. «Right?»
Bette looked down, again. «It’s complicated»
«Fuck! Just… Can’t you just say what it’s in your fucking mind?»
«I’m scared!» she said, raising her voice a little too much. Then she continued with a quiter voice. «I’m scared… I don’t think we should keep doing this. I… I’m hurting another person. And I hate what I’m doing, again… I’m doing  this again and I know how it ends. No matter what, someone always ends up hurting. I always end up hurting someone else. I don’t want to do this to Jodi… I promised her I won’t break her heart and if we continue this… thing… like you said, she will be devastated»
‘This thing, she said. She referred to what happened between us as -this thing-’  Tina tried to garner Bette’s words. Fuck, that hurt. She felt like she was going to die. «Thanks, Bette»
As Bette gave her a questioning look, she added: «Don’t you realize how much you just hurt me? You said: ‘this thing’ like if those seven years we spent together meant nothing. For me, it wasn’t a ‘thing’. I felt… I felt alive… again. I felt like I could climb the fucking Everest because you were loving me, touching me… you said you missed me. You said that what you were feeling for Jodi doesn’t really compare to what we had or have, I don’t know what to think anymore… You just said you don’t want to hurt anyone. But you just did, you just ripped my heart off my chest and threw it out of the fucking window. How do you think I’m feeling right now? You can’t… you can’t fool me this way. You can’t give me hopes and then decide to quit it and go on like nothing happened. Fuck, what was I thinking… this is probably how it happened with Candace. I’m so fucking hurt that I’m even starting to feel bad for her… Can you believe it? I should’ve known, I should’ve known you were going to turn your back on me and return to Jodi. I should’ve known that for you, it was just something about sex. You can’t help it. I’ve been there, I should’ve fucking known. You just opened your fucking legs to another woman -me- and fucked her. Just like you did three years ago! You are a fucking selfish, Bette. I thought you changed… but apparently you’re still the same selfish person» those words came out her mouth like a blast.