“I can’t do this anymore. I can’t take you wanting this as much me and fighting it because I made a decision to protect you. Now true enough my decision was fucked up, but I had my reasons and you have to know that they were only to protect what I thought you wanted.” Bette was standing looking down at Tina as she saw Tina raise her head and her eyebrows formed a questioning look.

“You thought that I wanted this? You really thought that I wanted this; somebody that cheats on me. And can’t give the common decency to at least break up before she fucked the next woman.” Tina was on her feet and shouting “You honestly thought that what I wanted was someone to lie to me and tell me everything was alright while she…” she couldn’t finish the thought her head was starting to pound again with more intensity. “You honestly don’t know me at all then.” She closed her eyes and threw her head back, she took slow deep breaths as she heard Bette speak again.

“You have to know Tina that I never wanted this for you. I truly thought that Justine was going to be what you wanted, I wanted her to change to make you happy. I couldn‘t… I didn‘t know how to…” Bette slid down the wall and rested her arms on her knees as she continued. “For me to tell you would be like asking me to choose between family and friendship. Despite everything Justine is still my family, really the only family I have out here.”

Tina brought her head back front to see Bette sitting on the floor with her hands cradling her head, she spoke sternly “I never wanted you to choose between family and friendship, Bette! I would never ask you to do that.” Tina was wringing her hands together as it was she could do to keep them from flailing about “All I wanted was for you to choose between right and wrong. That’s all I’ve ever asked of you. Nothing more nothing less”

Bette began to cry, she knew Tina was right. Maybe it was her cowardice that held the truth from Tina. She knew she couldn’t keep using that same excuse forever to justify the pain she helped inflict upon Tina. Tina heard the soft whimpers of her friend on the floor defeated by her wrong choices in life. Slowly Tina walked over to Bette and she kneeled down in front of her. Bette sat with her hands holding the backs of her thighs and her chin stuck tight to her chest. Tina lifted Bette’s eyes to hers she leant forward and kissed her lips softly, she could feel the moisture from her tears. They both closed their eyes as the feel of the others lips was gentle and sensitive. Bette’s eyes remained closed as she felt Tina’s soft hands caress her cheeks almost rubbing away the tears, slowly she took a hold of Tina’s wrists. Still she felt nervous because she knew there was something to this kiss that was uneasy and full of angst.