“What about the bathroom?”

I sign with relief, again grateful she hadn’t caught my use of the word ‘we’, there was no longer a we, “I didn’t need it there”

“Office?”

I shake my head, confused by her reaction – she looked on the verge of tears and once Dana got started it was close to impossible to calm her, It was something I had always tried to prevent at all cost. “Dana I’m sure it has a good home now” I didn’t know what else to say, I hadn’t realised it meant so much to her. It was a lamp, it’s soul purpose to illuminate, she’d never let on that it meant more, maybe it held sentimental value – how was I to know? It was an Ikea lamp for god sake! “I’ll go online and buy you another one.” I offered.

“It won’t be the same” she lowered her head and practised her breathing like I taught her to after rendering her breathless on our very first weekend sex marathon. ”… Look Alice, It’s no big deal”

It was, I could tell. It was in the slump of her shoulders, in her pout, Heck – it was in the way she said my name. I didn’t know why but this was a big deal and I knew I’d be online the minute she left, searching. I wouldn’t rest until I found the stupid thing, I’ll start with Ikea – fuck! I had to start now if I wanted to find it and meet my deadline.

“Are you okay on your own?”  It’s not like I was helping by standing here beside her gawking while she searched but still I felt the need to ask..

“Yes” she answered, snaking her way under my bed.

She continued to wiggle around beneath the bed searching. “Can I get you something to drink? eat?” I was now talking to her feet, the only visible part of her body.

“No”

“Okay. Yell if you need me.”

“Will do”

Leaving her, I drifted off into the kitchen making myself a cup of coffee before settling down in front of my laptop. Once seated, I extend my arms above my head, stretching and mentally preparing myself for the challenge ahead. I had a lamp to find!