Chapter 11


Angelica sat on Tina’s bed, crossed legged, watching her apply her make-up with care and absolute precision.

“I don’t know why you’re taking this long to get ready. How many shows have you gone to?”

“I’ve been to every show your mother has put on, you know that. And for your information I always take this amount of time to get ready.”

“We’d never get out of the house if that were true,” Angelica mumbled causing Tina to smile at her reflection in the mirror.

“Remind me why I have to go again?” she asked her mother.

“Because it’s important for Mama B and her career and she wants to share the special night with you.”

“So I’m punished by having to go walk around boring art because why?”

Tina turned and faced her daughter having completed putting her make-up on her face.

“Think of it this way, you can use that time wisely to bug your aunts about all the questions you want answered.”

Angelica sat stunned, not sure where the conversation was going to lead but knowing she needed to address her mother’s comments.

“What makes you think I’d do that?”

“Oh I don’t know Angie, maybe your past behavior. I know you quizzed your Aunt Helena and I can only assume someone else got it as well.”

“I wouldn’t have to if you would talk to me,” Angelica said defiantly.

“I’m aware of this,” Tina retorted with a smile. “You’ll be happy to know that all of your questions will be answered soon enough.”

“Really?” Angelica sat up straight, excited about the prospect of knowing why her parents couldn’t be together given their love.

“After Mama B’s show, we are going to sit down with you and talk, we agreed on that yesterday.”

“Um, what’s the catch Mom?”

“No catch, within reason you can ask your questions and we’ll do our best to answer them.”

“What time do we have to leave?” Angelica asked eyeing Tina’s clock across the room.

“In an hour,” Tina answered.

“Can I be excused to call Cathy?”

“That good of news that you need to do it now?”

“Kinda,” Angelica said blushing.

“Yes you can get on the phone for a few minutes and tell Cathy the news that you’ve worn us down and we’re going to have the talk you’ve been wishing for your entire adult life,” Tina said mocking Angelica.

“Thanks Mom,” Angelica said as she ran out of Tina’s room unaware of her mother’s pointed jab.




Kristen sauntered up to Bette with her dress open in the back, revealing her creamy, soft back with no obvious signs of wearing a bra.

“Would you mind?” she asked as she made an effort to slide up closer to Bette for her to zip her dress up.

“Absolutely not,” Bette said smiling. “On the condition that I’ll be lowering this tonight as well.”

“Of course,” Kristen said smiling as she felt Bette’s fingertips against her back, running over her skin, tickling the hardly exposed area. “Keep that up Bette and we won’t get to the gallery anytime soon.”

“Unfortunately, you’re right and I need to get there earlier rather then later.”

Bette finished combing her hair and slid into her designer suit coat over her black, expensive bra.

“I’m so proud of you,” Kristen said from behind her, desperate to hide her emotions of the upcoming evening.

“You’ve been there for me the entire time haven’t you?” Bette asked turning around and holding Kristen in her arms. “I can’t tell you how much that means to me.”

“I think I know.”

“I’m not sure you do.”

“Let’s say I do, just to agree, and get to the gallery on time?” Kristen said plastering the best smile on her face that she could muster.

“You ok Honey?” Bette asked her.

“Sure, fine, why do you ask?” Kristen said as she made a production of walking out of Bette’s arms and turning away from her to hide the tears that threatened to cascade out of her eyes and down her cheeks.

“A feeling I suppose. You want to tell me what’s going on?”

“Not really, not on your big night Bette.”

“I’d rather you tell me now then have it hanging over my head during the opening.”

“Hanging over your head?” Kristen said as she turned to face her lover. “Really Bette? I don’t buy that you’d be thinking of this on your big night. That’s your focus I’m sure as it should be.”

Kristen walked out of Bette’s bedroom, determined to avoid the conversation until later that night when she was prepared to tell Bette she was leaving.



“I’m telling you Cat, she said I could ask about anything!” Angelica sounded exuberated at the thought of the pending conversation.

“What are you going to ask them?”

“I don’t know, that’s the issue. I have so many questions I have no clue how I’m going to get them all in.”

“Anything you can’t ask?”

“She said within reason,” Angelica said confused. “I’m not sure what that means though.”

“I think they’ll let you know if you ask something you shouldn’t be asking.”

“I want to ask about some of the stuff that was said Cat, but I’m so embarrassed by what I saw that one weekend that I don’t want to ask what it means.”

“Ask your Mom when Mama B isn’t there. That way you don’t have to admit to her face that you saw her having, well, you know,” Cathy said as she trailed off not having to finish the sentence.

“I can’t,” Angelica said almost in pain. “I can’t ask my mom what some of those things mean without getting her mad.”

“Why would she be mad that someone that was teasing you called her names? It isn’t your fault.”

“What would you do?”

“I’d tell them what was said and ask if it had anything to do with what you saw,” Cathy said.

“I guess so,” Angelica resigned herself to the thought of facing her mothers and asking sexual questions, but she also knew that she wanted to have everything answered. If she didn’t ask now, she may not get another chance at having their undivided attention and willingness to answer the many things she wanted to know.



Bette got to the gallery two hours before the show was set to open. She had last minute details to tend to, including ensuring the lighting was perfect based on what she decided earlier the day before.

Kristen had decided on merely walking around the gallery looking at the works of art that were displayed. She stopped at a few that caught her eye, knowing which ones Bette probably already set aside for display in her private collection. She felt the nostalgic feeling wash over her quickly, almost as if she were unable to prepare for it. She knew she’d miss Bette, there was no question that was where her heart belonged.

She wiped a stray tear that made it’s way out of her eyes, one of the few she could no longer hold back although she tried with everything she had to hold them all back. She checked her cell phone in her purse for the time, knowing that she had a few hours left before she plastered her brave exterior on and got through the night knowing that at the end of it, she wouldn’t be celebrating with Bette. She’d be leaving her and sleeping at her own house which is not where she wanted to be.

“You must like this one since you’ve been standing there in front of it for 10 minutes already,” Bette said from behind Kristen.

“I didn’t know I was being watched,” Kristen said smiling as Bette came up from behind and wrapped her arms around Kristen’s waist.

“I can’t help it sometimes.”

“Well I’m completely flattered. You’ve left me speechless and that’s not easy to do.”

Bette chuckled softly, planting strategically placed kisses on Kristen’s neck and behind her ear. Kristen closed her eyes, took a deep breath in, and prayed to cement this moment in her memory for years to come. She knew there would be a time where she’d be able to look back on it without the pain, only seeing it fondly, and knowing she did the right thing in protecting herself.




“I have a question now Mom,” Angelica said as she sat beside Tina on the couch.

Tina looked up from the script she was attempting to finish before she had to leave for the opening.

“Is now an ok time to ask?”

“Don’t you want to wait for Mama B to be here when you do?”

“No,” Angelica said quickly. “I think this is more of a you and I question.”

“I wasn’t aware we had you and I questions.”

“Is that ok?” Angelica inquired.

“Of course, it makes me happy to know that we’ve got you and I questions.” Tina placed her script down at her feet so she wouldn’t be tempted to eye it while her daughter was talking. She motioned for Angelica to snuggle in close to her and she put her arm around her to offer her a sense of security while she talked.

“That girl in school,” Angelica started slowly, “she said some things that I don’t understand.”

“You can ask me anything Angie, I hope you know that.”

Angelica smiled at her mom’s soft tones that typically soothed her, yet this was different. She hadn’t broached the subject of sex with her mothers and she wasn’t sure how her Mother would react.

“That girl Melissa in school, she said some things about you and Mama B that I don’t know what they mean.”

“What things,” Tina asked dreading what she thought was coming.

“She said that you and Mama B were carpet munchers.”

“Ah,” Tina said rolling her eyes at Melissa’s immaturity. “That’s Melissa being immature.”

“What does it mean?”

“It’s something used as a derogatory terms from small-minded people to describe lesbians.”

“I got that much Mom,” Angelica shot back.

“I know I said you could ask anything, but that particular thing isn’t something that I think needs to be discussed.”

Tina got up and paced the length of the living room trying to determine the appropriate words to use with her daughter to describe why she wasn’t desiring to talk to her about things of a sexual nature.

“I thought you said I could ask anything!” Angelica sputtered, now allowing her emotions to erupt so much like Bette.

“I did, but there are certain things that shouldn’t even be justified by us wasting our time on the discussion.”

“My friends said it’s the way lesbians have sex! Is that true?” Angelica asked to push on and get more information.

“Angie,” Tina said calmly trying to ease her daughter’s mind without telling her too much. She didn’t have a chance before Angelica shot up and tried to walk past her in anger toward her room.

“I’m not as clueless as you think I am!” Angelica was yanked back as Tina grabbed her arm and struggled to remain calm at dealing with another personality that mirrored Bette’s difficult one.

“Angelica, I’m not finished yet and I didn’t say you were clueless. On the other hand, I don’t want to add credence to someone using derogatory terms to describe an act of love and commitment between two women.”

“Commitment?” Angelica asked in a panicked voice. “That’s just what I need!”

“What does that mean?” Tina asked now losing her patience but struggling to reign her emotions in.

“It means that I don’t need Kristen in my life anymore!”

Tina was dumbfounded as Angelica stomped past her and into her room, trying to shut the conversation down before she revealed too much. She was shocked when Tina swung the door open without so much as a knock.

“I’m busting my hump here Angie to try to allow you an opportunity to ask your questions. Not only do I need to deal with your temper tantrums, but I also have to manage your mothers, which isn’t fun. I spent the better half of yesterday talking to her to get her to agree to sit down with you and I and discuss things that maybe she isn’t too comfortable doing.”

Tina sat down on the bed obviously angry with Angelica.

“This,” she waived her hand in the air around Angelica’s head, “this is the thanks I get? You storming off because you don’t give me a chance to explain.”

Angelica felt the tears stream down her face, unable to hold them back as she stared at her mother who was, in fact, working hard to help her understand.

“It’s not that,” she sputtered.

“What is it then?”

“I saw her,” Angelica said quietly. “The week she walked around calling you and Mom a carpet muncher I saw it myself.”

Angelica buried her head in the pillow on her bed, wishing Tina would leave her alone for a bit so she could cry in private.

“Saw what Angie?” Tina asked as she placed her hand on Angelica’s back.

“I can’t tell you.”

“Why?” Tina lifted Angelica’s head so her words weren’t muffled by the pillow anymore. “You have to tell me if I’m going to help you and obviously someone calling us carpet munchers is upsetting to you.”

Angelica just nodded her head as she wiped tears away from her cheeks.

“I saw Mama B,” she said in a voice just above a whisper.

“Saw her what Baby?” Tina asked as she wiped Angelica’s hair away from her face.

“With Kristen, in the pool at her house.”

Tina looked at her daughter with concern etched in her face.

“What did you see exactly Honey?”

“I saw her having sex,” Angelica said avoiding all eye contact with her mother.

“Angie,” Tina said in a cautious tone, “I need you to tell me what you saw ok? I’m not mad at you, but I want to know what you saw so I can better answer your questions.”

“I saw Mama B, with Kristen in the pool.”

“I take it they weren’t swimming?”

“No, no suits. Mama B, well, Kristen was standing between her legs in the water.”

“Where was Mama B?”

“Sitting on the edge of the pool,” Angelica said sadly.

“Ok,” Tina held her close as relief washed over her. “We’ve got to go to the opening right now, but when we get home or early tomorrow I’ll explain what that was. I’m not mad at you, ok?”

Angelica just nodded as she steadied her breath and got up to walk outside and into the car for the opening leaving Tina behind alone in her room.

“Damn you Bette, you’ve got some explaining to do!” Tina said loudly as she slammed her fist down on Angelica’s desk in anger. “Your opening is just the time to do it too!”