"Marina Ferrer." "Hello, Tina is calling." "Jesus." "Please, don’t be angry with Jenny, but she mentioned Bette unintentionally as she was telling me of your call. She was so sorry, particularly because she had promised you to say nothing to me. Well, however, now I know it." "I’m sorry, but I am a little confused." "I can understand, but I think, it maybe wouldn’t be such a bad idea to call you and to get to know a little bit more about the situation." "Wouldn’t it be better you talked to Bette?" "Yes, you are right. But to do that I need her telephone number or address. Would you like to give it to me?" "Jesus, I don’t know what Bette would say… on the other hand, …?" "Yes?" "Well, I know that she would also like to talk to you but she hasn’t found the courage for it. Maybe it is not so silly if you had the possibility to call Bette when ever you want. I mean, nevertheless, this would be fair, right?" "It would be. Has Bette asked you then not to give me her number or address?" "Well, not directly, no. For 3 days I’ve been trying to reach her because I wanted to tell her, that I have spoken to Jenny and that I have erroneous mentioned her name. But I haven’t reached her yet. As far as I know, she has vacation and maybe she has driven somewhere." "Bette is not in Seattle?" "Sorry, Tina, but I don’t know. What can I say? She doesn’t answer the phone. I want go to her this evening. Can I tell her something from you?" "No, please, don’t do that. It’s better if I talked alone to her. Do you understand?" "Yes. Well, so, do you have a piece of paper and a pencil?" "Yes, moment … okay, I’m ready." Marina gave me your address and your telephone number which I wrote down in a hurry. Step by step I got closer to you. I was excited so much, almost as if I had a blind date with a woman whom I knew so damn long, but I had never seen her. "How are you, Marina?" "I’m fine. I expect Jenny has told a little bit about me?" "Yes, she has. I would like it if we called each other sometimes again and also meet again." "Please, don’t misunderstand me, but I think, we both first need a little time for ourselves, short-spoken, you for Bette and I for Jenny." "Yes, that’s true." "But when everything calmed down, then I’d like to visit you and the others in L.A. I think there are some things to explain to you. I owe you that, and I also know it." "It’s really okay, Marina. We have understood why you withdrew." "Well, I just think, it was not fair of me, not fair to you, to my friends and how I know the lesbian scene there are so many rumors to rectify, right?" Marina laughed. "You know that we have never given a lot on rumors, but yes, there were a lot of it, especially after you were away and your husband had appeared here." "I will explain you everything, I promise … when it’s the right time for it, okay?" "Okay."

I long played with that piece of paper on which your number was written. Like a tiger in his cage I worriedly ran through our house. I tried to do something, I washed the dishes, arranged the bed, I hovered the floor, I cleared up, I read, music on, music off, a little nap at the pool, I pulled the weed, truncated the flowers … nothing of it worked.

And suddenly, it shot into my head. I had made a decision.