Alice is tired, but fine. Oh Howie, you should’ve been there to see her. I know I shouldn’t really laugh, but she was absolutely hysterical. Can you just imagine Alice in labour? It all started out relatively good. We were at home when she got the first contractions and she was being super calm. I was panicking, ringing the hospital and looking for our bags. Alice kept saying “Dana relax, we have loads of time the contractions have only started.” So I finally calm down and Alice has a bath, you know to help with pains and stuff. We walk around the apartment, doing our breathing and everything is all good. Then suddenly out of nowhere BOOM, Alice becomes a raving lunatic. Screaming, shouting, telling me how much she hates me for talking her into this, you name it I got the lot. We were stood in the apartment waiting for the cab and Alice was facing me with her nails digging into my shoulder. I swear to god Howie, I near felt like screaming out in pain myself, but that would’ve made Alice worse than she already was. Anyway, I tried telling her to control her breathing and she was like “Dana, I bloody know how to breathe, im not a moron. Why don’t you try pushing this thing out and we’ll see how far you and your breathing gets.” Oh god, if I wasn’t so taken aback at the time I would’ve laughed. So we eventually made it to the hospital after what felt like a life time in the back of a cramped, claustrophobic cab. Alice was swinging from shouting, crying and surprisingly laughing. Trying to gauge what mood she was in was like trying to find a needle in a hay stack.impossible. Of course I always got it wrong, when I cracked jokes I got a look that would turn your heart to stone. When I tried to comfort her I got shrugged off and told to stop mollycoddling her, as in her words she was having a baby not god damn dying. Then when I tried to calm her down and be firm when she was being irate she burst into tears. The whole thing was an emotional rollercoaster, but something I wouldn’t change for the world.

Alice is now getting back to her usual self and we are coming to terms with the fact that we are actually parents. We have this little life that is totally dependent on us and I wont lie when I say it is the scariest thing I’ve ever felt. I sometimes wonder if we can do it and then I look at Alice and our baby and I know we can. We can do it because we have a whole lot of love to give to that little girl and we will do everything in our power to do what is best and right for her. We may at times get it wrong, but that is part of learning. I know in the end we will always get there, our love will see us through.

Well I’ve went on enough and I’m getting a little soppy and emotional, so I’m going to leave it here. Keep your letters coming and if you don’t there will be trouble, do you hear me.

Love you lots, Dana. xxxxxx