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    The Past Is Gone. part 20

                – Why wouldn’t you be as happy as me?- Alice says frowning.

                -The answer to your question honey, is walking towards the door with that blonde over there.- Dana says pointing Shane with her stare, and Alice just mouths an Oh, I just nod.

                – You haven’t talked to her? You have to talk to her Sydney.-

                – No, I’ve said all the things I needed to say, I told her everything, now there’s nothing I can do, it’s in her hands now, but I have a feeling, that it just won’t happen.-

                – You don’t know what you’re talking about, she loves you, she does- Dana says, wish I could believe it.

                – Well then why doesn’t she say anything? All I need is a sign, something to know that she’s interested but she hasn’t spoke to me in weeks and that’s just not a very good sign to me.-

                When the party was over, and everyone had left the place, I was alone outside Bette, Tina and Angie are off to the honey moon, Alice and Dana couldn’t get their hands off each other so they left early, I didn’t exactly knew about Carmen and Jenny but Carmen said she needed to talk to me later, I said yes but I wasn’t  looking forward to it. When I got home, I got off the fancy clothes and put on my Pj’s then stepped outside and seat, I was just looking at the sky, the stars the all the sudden I felt someone sitting beside me, I turned around and saw Carmen, she was staring at the sky too.

                – What are you doing here Carmen?-

                – Told you I needed to talk to you, didn’t I?- she said still staring at the sky

                – Yes you did, I just don’t know what do you want to talk about.-

                – The night you leftWhen you saw me leaving Shane’s room-

                – I don’t want to hear it, I didn’t let Shane explain, and I won’t let you, it’s just none of my  business-

                – No, but it is your business, you have everything to do with it, she called me because she needed to talk to talk about you Shane and I are friends nothing more that particular night it was late, I was at my home and all the sudden I get a call from her asking if I could come over so when I got there, she was sitting on her bed head in her hands, lost and confused she was already in her underwear, just for the record. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was she told me all the feelings she had for you were getting too much for her to handle, and she asked for my advice, so I told her she should be brave for once and face up to  feelings, you scared the shit out of her but I think she was actually considering the idea of telling you what she felt, but then you walked in, and didn’t believe her, which was normal maybe I wouldn’t have believe it either the thing is you left for three months.-

                – Well, that’s certainly not the kind of conversation I thought this will be, but are you trying to say that I might have lost her because I left?-

                – No, if anything she just loves you more. But she’s scared, she doesn’t want to hurt you like that again, she says you are finally where you belong, you’ve found a family and she doesn’t want you to give up on that if you ever fight or something, that’s why she hasn’t look for you, although she really wants to.-

                I got speechless, I wasn’t expecting Carmen to say that, I actually had no idea was she was gonna say, but the thing is that I don’t know what to do with the information I just been given. Should I go to Shane? Or should I just give her space? Oh fuck it, I’m tired of playing like this. I’m gonna go to her. Carmen just left said that Jenny was waiting for her, and also slapped my on the head “Why the hell would I want to give up Jenny? She’s the best thing that ever happened to me. I wouldn’t I love her  too much”. 

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