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    The Real Tibette Watch Gen Q – Episode 5

    ‘I am not!’

    ‘You are too!’

    ‘No, I’m not!’

    ‘Are too!’

    ‘Kids . . .’ Sunny said, in his most soothing tone.

    ‘Mother?’ Angie appealed to Bette.

    ‘Jesus . . .’ said Kit.

    Sasha burped monstrously and squealed, ‘It smells of pineapple!’

    She breathed this fruity gift all over Solly the dog, who was sitting beside her on a bench seat. Bette, meanwhile, was making camomile tea and trying not to laugh.

    ‘I’m not playing with her any more,’ Ben said, folding his arms.

    ‘See?’ Angie pointed at him then made a megaphone from her hands. ‘Bad loser!’

    ‘You cheated!’

    ‘Ben,’ Bette said, putting her finger up to warn Angie against saying any more, ‘you were beaten fair and square. Angelica, stop gloating. Sasha, burping is rude.’

    ‘Solly likes it,’ grinned Bette’s youngest. ‘He licked the inside of my mouth.’

    ‘Oh my lord,’ Kit said, looking ill at the very thought.

    ‘You know he licks his own ass?’ Ben told his little sister.

    ‘You can’t say that!’

    ‘It’s a fact!’

    ‘That’s enough!’ Bette said sharply. Silence fell. ‘Now, look. It’s almost ten o’clock and you have a decision to make. Keep fighting and go straight to bed and make Sunny and Kit never want you to visit ever again – or settle down and play one more game as if you actually like each other.’

    All three of her children stared at her, like it was a real choice.

    ‘So, what’s it gonna be?’


    ‘Rapidough,’ Bette told Tina on the phone five minutes later.

    ‘Oh, I love that game!’

    ‘I know.’

    ‘Ben chose it.’

    ‘Yes, he did.’

    Tina gave a little whiny moan, a sound of longing, thinking about the scene Bette had just described to her: the Porter-Kennard clan, all chaos and noise, getting to stay up late one more Sunday night before school resumed.

    ‘How was your day?’ Bette asked.

    ‘Good,’ Tina replied. ‘Mae Martin is exactly what you’d expect. Smart, charming. I’m gonna love working with them. And Alice sends her love, and Runa found new ear pods for me, so I’m all set.’

    Bette laughed. Tina lost ear pods on almost a weekly basis. Runa was Tina’s PA and all-round miracle worker. It always made Bette relax when she travelled with Tina.

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    1. Hey Largo,

      You again did a excellent job on describing episode 5.

      I look more forward to read this than watching the actually episode on tv.

      Don’t know if i will watch the next episodes, depends what will be written on Social media after it aired on tv. They imply Fake Bette will hook up with Pippa, don’t feel the need to watch that.

      Looking forward to read your thoughts via Bette and Tina next week!

    2. Agree with Bibi. May need to rely on your episodes when Pippa enters the scene. My favorite lines by far: “Fake Tina, meanwhile, glowed despite wearing the world’s worst-fitting jacket. ‘‘They really like that big, square, Soviet-era tailoring for you,’ said Bette, mystified. ‘I’d never wear that.’ ‘It’s hideous. And yet I still wanna jump you.’ “

      And yet she still wants to jump her. Just perfect. I really like way you mix the real and fake couples. Looking forward to next week.

      • Hi Billy! Thanks so much for keeping up with these wee stories and for commenting. Sorry for the delay in replying – I had to post-and-run bc of work. :-(

        Thank you for highlighting that bit about T’s clothes. Honestly, Laurel is a beautiful woman, I have no idea why they want to dress her so badly??? Drives me crazy! lol

        Take care and thank you again, my friend

      • Hello Annie! Lovely to see you here and thank you very much for reading my writing and for commenting. :-)

        I’m sorry about the delay in replying. I had to post-and-run bc of work. I’m really glad you like the stories!

    3. Lots of stuff to njoy in YOUR synopsis of the real -vs-Fake:
      1. The PK clan, “all chaos and noise, getting to stay up late = nice image
      2. Bette laughed. Tina lost her EarPods on almost a weekly basis = cute
      3. Her Satanic Majesty….She’s about as subtitle a a brick…And about as alluring as anthrax = tells us ladies how U
      really feel.
      4. Wow, said Tina. It’s a good line, the support-but-not-agree thing. I think I use that about once a wk, said Bette
      5. But it’s NOT simply white people who don’t see you and Fake Bette as black. Black people don’t see you that
      Way either = peeps always want to stamp a label on someone else’s forehead.
      6. I liked when you took my hand, Tina said, . . . Bette smiled. You didn’t take it away . . . Fake Tina still love Fake
      Bette, Tina said, her tone like velvet . . . ***withOUT Fake Tina, Fake Bette is a howling VOID*** = the WHOLE show
      In a nutshell!!!!
      7. . . . Last spotted trying pathetically to carve a sliver of affection from the black GRANITE of Fake Bette’s soul =
      The complaint of every woman who has wanted Bette when the walls around her emotions are in place.
      8. People are complicated and I think timing is complicated. What do I know? = Shane is right and I use her truth
      to open the door of what seems to be an unrealistic reconciliation of Tibette as THE End Game

      The teaser photos that have been released about this season point to the “hand (Bette’s???) on the tattooed back (Pippa’s ???” But since we haven’t seen everyone’s bare back it’s hard to guess.

      I’ve seen pictures of Episode7??? Where Bette & Pippa are at an opening featuring Pipp(???) and they BOTH are stunning. View from behind looks like they’re talking to Carrie (???). If it is Carrie she is doing a happy dance seeing Bette with someone who ISN’T Tina. Hmmmm

      • Hi Dumplin! Sorry for delay in replying. I had to post-and-run bc of work. :-(

        So lovely of you to highlight those bits you liked, especially the bit about FB being a holding void without FT. I agree that this basically explains the whole show, Tibette-wise. It’s painful to watch. FB is so lost, all her flaws are magnified and her virtues stunted.

        Also, yes, I did have them go to town a bit on Cherie Jaffe, but really – she’s such a caricature. I don’t believe Tess would go with that woman for one second!

        The Pippa thing…. I’ve seen some of those tattoo-back photos and I’m not convinced at all that those tattoos belong to Pippa. To be honest, the hand on the back looks to have darker skin than the back, so in what world is Bette’s hand darker than Pippa’s back? Maybe I’m wrong, though. Cameras and lighting can do funny things.

        I’m still fairly confident we’re getting Tibette endgame, but they’re going to – as they’re so fond of saying – make us earn it. Just really hoping the show is renewed at this point.

        Thanks, Dumplin, for your great comments and for reading my writing. Means a lot to me.
        Take care

    4. Thank you for the chapter!

      First – about Autostraddle – i despite them from the moment they start to hate Tibette and write how good fitting the worst couple ever in TLW – Jobette.

      Second – i’m not from US so i don’t get all this race problem. I don’t get how BLM in linking to Angie desire to donate kidney to complete stranger? Only because this stranger is black? And if Marcus was white – are Angie also was so determined to donate her kidney to him?

      Unfortunately next three chapters without fake Tina :(

      • Hi Zhenya! Sorry for the delay in replying. I had to post-and-run bc of work. :-(

        I understand your point about Autostraddle. I don’t read that website a huge amount but I appreciate a good vendetta, lol. You do you, my friend. :-)

        I’m not from the US either and I did feel a bit like ‘should I be even talking about this?’ when I wrote the Real Tibette’s thoughts on Angie’s feelings. I do read a lot, so I think I have a grasp on the issues but of course what I don’t have is any lived experience like Angie’s or Bette’s bc I’m white. So I just tried to understand it as best I could from the outside, and I think the point is that Marcus isn’t ‘a stranger’ to Angie, he’s – as we would say in Scotland – part of her clan, her wider family, i.e. the family of black people who everyone knows are black. It’s about solidarity, I think? But that’s just my understanding of it.

        yes, next three chapters without Fake Tina is a shame. But I have some fun in mind for Real Tibette, to make up for that. :-)

        Thank you, as ever, Zhenya for your time and comments on my writing. I really appreciate it and I’m glad you’re along for the ride!
        Take care

    5. Largo, thank you for another great chapter. I’m not only looking more forward to your recaps than the actual show, I’m enjoying the ‘Real Bette and Tina’ and their family antics more than their take on watching the show. I love the inclusion of their dog Solly. Bette cracked me up when she described her and Solly’s relationship… too cute. Bette has a wicked sense of humor and Tina plays off of it perfectly.

      The one thing I wished they had done in the episode was show a conversation between Fake Bette and Tina after they got to Bette’s house from therapy. It was a bit confusing on the show because it appeared as if listening to Fake Angie talking to Jordi that they were upstairs in Fake Angie’s room when she said her parents were downstairs, but then Fake Angie walked in the front door after seeing Jordi.

      Anyway my point is if Fake Bette and Tina were alone in the house I would have liked to have gotten their perspective on what Fake Angie said about her identifying more with Kit, Kayla and Marcus on the Black experience than with Fake Bette because she passes for White. I was brought back to several conversations on this topic from the original series about Real Bette passing for White and Real Tina having fears that she wasn’t qualified to raise a bi-racial child because she didn’t know what it was like to be Black.

      Both Kit and Yolanda (in the therapy session) called Real Bette out on letting people see what they wanted to see and using the fact that she could pass as White as an advantage. At the other extreme we had Real Bette declaring her Black heritage when her character ‘Bev’ in Lez Girls was cast with a White actress (not sure if she was Italian) but Fake Bette’s comment that White people think she’s Italian could relate back to that because as ‘Real Tina’ pointed it’s not just White people and I’m sure the assumption is not always Italian. .

      The other situation was when Real Tina was with Henry and people assumed Real Angelica was adopted (and Real Tina didn’t correct them) and also the whole scenario where Real Bette wanted sole custody to the point of kidnapping Angie because she didn’t want her growing up in a family where no one looked like her (Tina, Henry and Mikey). Ironically it happened anyway.

      I’d like to know if ‘Fake Bette’ feels like it’s one more thing that she’s failed at? Should Fake Bette be shouldering the full burden – Angie is half-White and it just seems dismissive to me that the other half of her heritage is totally ignored and we still have no idea about Tina’s family.

      I was wondering if Kit’s boyfriend Sonny was in Fake Angie’s life growing up, and if her cousin David ever got over his homophobia to have a relationship with her? Why doesn’t Fake Angie have any diverse friends from school or her drama club or whatever other activities she’s involved in? Seems there are so many options for her to explore and feel connected to her Black heritage than giving Marcus a kidney.

      Anyway more questions than answers as usual. We’ll see how they move the story along. Hopefully Fake Bette and Tina (even off screen) will be going with Angie to meet Marcus and will be fully involved in any conversations about donating or even testing to be a match.

      • BAT – agree with you on all points.

        Again, we have more questions than answers – still from OG & now GQ.

        Correct in that we still have NO idea about Tina’s family or heritage. Angie is half white – but does she even accept that part of herself?

        I did the Ancestry test a few years back & found that I have 1% black in me from the Iberian portion off of Spain. Supposedly from when the Moors invaded that area in the late 1100’s & early 1200’s.
        But what does that mean to me? I can’t relate to how Angie could be feeling as not being seen. Only my experience as a gay woman in a non gay society that shunned my orientation for decades.

        I can’t say at this point in time that Bette could see this as another failure – I don’t think we have enough information to determine that.

        I’m not sure how much the SL changed with the BLM movement & the murders last years – had JB always wanted to portray this SL & BLM made it more relevant??? Although I love JH, maybe they should have chosen an actress that had a lighter complexion to portray the Tibette daughter?? Angie in OG had a lighter skin tone & lighter hair color.
        It’s just a thought.

        • Hi Collins! *waves* I see you made another comment later, so I’ll try not to go on too long here, but thanks for these points.

          That’s interesting that you did the DNA thing. I wonder about trying that also. And yes, many of us will relate to our queerness as the way in which we don’t feel seen or at home in our societies. I did feel a bit like ‘should I even be discussing this?’ when I was writing the story, but then I just tried to use my empathy and observe what was happening and how it fit with what was being said. I think sometimes it’s a parent’s job to put their own needs second, so that’s what both Bettes do.

          Also think you’re right about JB and presumably other producers, MLR, writers, wanting to address these issues, and good for them. It’s maybe a bit clunky, but BLM has had a huge impact on especially younger POC, so I’m all for talking about that.

          Thanks! Will reply to your other comment in a minute :-)

      • Wow, BAT2012, what an amazing comment. Thank you so much. And I’m sorry for the delay in replying – I had to post-and-run bc of work. :-(

        I’ll try and not write an epic response but there obviously a few things I want to reply to…..

        Solly – I’m glad you like him! I don’t have a dog so he’s my fantasy dog, lol. Solomon (Solly), because, like all animals, he is wise. I love that he’s immune to Bette’s charms too. Ha! Finally!

        Yes, totally agree about the omission of B&T talking post-therapy and the idiocy of the timeline re Angie. WHY CAN’T THEY GET THINGS RIGHT??? This is their job, ffs

        Also agree that there are a lot of different messages about Bette being biracial in the show’s canon. They come from different characters, though, so that’s quite plausible. I know I can’t comment on this subject too much bc I’m white myself but I think Angie’s point about the way she and Bette walk through the world differently is completely correct, albeit painful for Bette in ways that Angie can’t understand either. What I tried to do in my story was to show that, as the parent, both Bettes (Fake and Real) understand that it’s their job to put themselves second at this time.

        Very interesting point as to whether this is something that FB feels she’s failed at. My Real Bette would blame herself for a day or two and then realise she was wallowing and stop it. Because she’s changed. That was part of her line in my Ep1 story, ‘what we fixed, stayed fixed’. My Bette has changed, but you’re absolutely right, Fake Bette doesn’t seem to have changed all that much.

        Also love your point about asking whether Kit and Sunny were together until Kit died, bc yes, that would have very much provided Fake Angie with a ‘Marcus’ figure. We can only assume, therefore, that Sunny was not on the scene???

        Regarding Angie’s friends…. sigh. This show is a soap, and it gets VERY sudsy sometimes. Maybe we should be grateful it hasn’t put anyone in a coma yet, well apart from the viewers.

        So, again, a huge THANK YOU, BAT2021, for the fantastic comment. I’m so pleased to have you along for the ride on these wee stories.
        Take care

    6. Hey Largo,

      Thank you for this chapter. It was so good – had a little bit of everything in it – family, extended family, sibling challenges, puppy love(Solly), careers, acceptance, vision & most of all love – and all lovely delivered by you.
      Great job!!!

      The ‘Bride of Chucky’ though for Cherie – just made me laugh soooo hard. Crazy stuff.

      As others have already noted – this chapter gave us more insight into the characters than GQ could even dream about.

      So many challenges in GQ that Marshit isn’t addressing – and the age old question – why the hell not? Nothing is completed or explained or given any depth. Similar to OG in that regard.

      But back to your chapter – still waiting for that certain itch to be scratched between Bette & Tina. We aren’t going to get it this season on GQ – throw us one of Solly’s bones & have a great love scene for them!!!! PLEASE!!!!

      You write such great love scenes too!!!

      Agree with your Tina telling your Bette that Fake Bette is nothing without Tina. We all know that – except Marshit!!!

      And what a great surprise for Bette at the end to have the love of her life back in her arms once again. Sweet.

      You did a fantastic job on this episode – the next few will be just as tough.

      But I know you will find some lightness in them – I have faith in you!!!

      Thanks so much for your talent & care.

      Tibette LIVES!!!!

      • Hello again! (where have I heard that, lol)

        I’m glad you liked Bride of Chucky, but come on…. ‘Marshit’ is genius! lol *applauds*

        I was really struggling for how to convey just how much I loathe Cherie Jaffe and then that popped into my head. I feel like I should apologise to Rosanna Arquette – it’s really only bc she’s so good at making CJ utterly repellent.

        Agree completely that it’s frustrating how little is explained in this show. I suppose it’s in service of the drama, but it sure is frustrating the scenes they choose to show. I can only assume it’s bc they staffed the writers’ room from a political perspective rather than an artistic perspective, so a lot of people are learning on the job. That’s our misfortune, but I only hope it doesn’t end up being theirs too when/if the show is cancelled. Not that MLR will give a damn, she’s got her lifeboat already.

        Ah well. Meanwhile, we roll up our fanfic sleeves! The next few eps will not be as much fun for sure, without Fake Tina’s wardrobe to make fun of, but I’ll do my best. And don’t worry about that itch, btw. It’s all in hand, haha ;-)

        Thanks again, my friend. I’m humbled and grateful for your time and support and really delighted you like the stories.

        Take care & speak soon

        • Largo,

          One of the biggest issues with GQ IMO is that the cast is just too large.
          OG was like that to an extent – they had 9 characters in the original cast – Tibette, Kit, Shane, Alice, Dana, Jenny Tim, Marina – still was a little heavy IMO, but it worked.

          GQ – Tibette, Shane, Alice, Angie, Dani, Sophie, Gigi, Nat, Micah, Finley, Tess, Maribel, Dani’s father, Quiara – that’s 15 people – waaaaayyyyyyyyy too many to keep tabs on & to write for. This season is just the same – still too many people spinning with no destination. And let’s not forget ROD this season too.


          • I’m pretty sure MLR, given the choice, wouldn’t have had any OG. characters. I think it really boils her piss not only that Tibette are the most popular characters but that they are played by straight actors. So what we have is, in effect, two shows in one, hence two casts. In order to tell her polyamory story, her disability story, her trans stories, her race stories, she felt she had to create all those from scratch and somehow fit them around the OGs. And then everyone in the writers’ room has to get at least one idea on the screen otherwise what are they there for, and don’t forget she hired them, so if she doesn’t use their ideas it looks like she chose badly…. And we have what we have. Sigh. I just hope it gets picked up, but only if JB and LH will be in it!

    7. Largo, Fantastic story and interpretations and perspectives. This story is brilliant, the various comments are just as entertaining and I appreciate everyone’s thoughts. I’ve enjoyed reading both. Keep up the good writing… a job well done!

      • Hi bumsue! *waves* Thanks so much for reading this story and taking the time to comment. I’m in one of those little phases where I’m not sure what to write next so it’s lovely to see that the old stories still get visited from time to time, haha. And yes, like you I really enjoy the discussions we were able to have here about the GQ episodes. Good times, despite the show!

        Thanks again, and take care

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