She was trying to be rational and logical it seemed.  But God help me the mention of the lack of permanency just reminded me of ‘why’ I wasn’t in my home in the first place, thereby fueling my ire.  Alice’s board a clear visualization.  I accepted the initiated contact, resolved to create an atmosphere that worked for us but did I have to be completely accommodating as well ignoring that her betrayal forced me from my home?

People say the most hurtful things, seemingly especially at times when caution and temperance were of utmost importance.  I’m human – and was victim to the urge to lash out.

“You’re right,” I say and continue, unable to restrain the urge, “You’ve never made me want for anything… financially.” 

That elicited a sharp intake of breath, audible although masked by what I could only assume was her hand’s involuntary rush to cover her mouth.  Yes that was entirely uncalled for. 

My white flag of surrender was frantically waving for understanding.  I was utterly sorry for intimating she was completely or partially lacking with everything else other than financial support. Without a doubt, untrue.

“Bette, I didn’t mean…” I began to say but she rescues me from my plea.

“Don’t give it another thought.  Make no mistake I deserved that…most likely even more.”  The moment not allowing for interruption she rushed on, sounding more like the decisive and assertive Bette I’d relied on for so long.”

Maybe we can agree to focus on what needs to be done about the accounts and related items.  We don’t need to cover – other things at the meeting. Let’s keep things…simple between us so to speak and we can get our finances sorted out.”

Relieving myself from my indignation, rightful or otherwise, I agreed readily to her suggestion of keeping to the intended matter of the assignation uncomplicated and light.  Then made a final effort to assuage my regret from earlier, “Bette – I…”

“Tina, I know.  Forget about it.  I’ll e-mail you the address and some information on the firm that will be helping us sort through things.  See you next week. Okay?”

So here we are, a week later in a warmly decorated yet infinitely sterile conference room reviewing assets and equitable distribution.  Astounding how the legal world creates the illusion of controlled courtesy and lack of emotion with select words.