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Tina sat staring out the window of Dr. Cron’s office with a box of tissue on her lap and a despondent look on her face. This had been a regular event for Tina since Bette’s breakdown almost two months ago. Tina had followed Dr. Cron’s recommendation and left Bette alone to sort out what had happened. This went counter to everything Tina felt. But, when she thought about it, talking to Bette was more for her sake then Bette’s. Tina had profound guilt for her role in causing Bette so much emotional pain. She had been reliving that night over and over in her head trying to figure out what she could have done to prevent what had happened. In the end, with Dr. Cron’s help, she came to realize that Bette had so much more than the problems of their relationship eating at her. The painting was just a catalyst for something that was on the verge of happening for a long time. Tina had been finding it harder and harder to talk in therapy. She wanted to talk, but struggled with articulating her feelings to Dr. Cron. She wasn’t sure why, but she found herself averting her gaze usually looking out the window, as she was doing now.
”I have been doing a lot of thinking about what I have done to my family. At first I made a resolution to myself.”
”What sort of resolution?”
”I resolved never to say or do anything which could possibly cause Bette or Angie pain.
Dr. Cron looked at Tina inquisitively.
Noticing Dr. Cron’s look, Tina explained ”I had thought if I had stopped making such impulsive decisions it could mitigate some of their emotional pain.”
”Can you actually control anybody’s emotions?”
”Well, I guess, I never thought of it that way.” Tina paused, ”I changed my mind anyways about the resolution. The more I thought about it, the more I realized I was falling into the same way of thinking that got me here in the first place.” Tina sat in thought as she stared out the window, ”I guess I was thinking that I am taking responsibility for my actions, but in reality I am trying to take control over Bette’s feelings.”