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    What if- chapter three

     

    "It’s over. I’m done." Bette held onto her head with both her hands trying to forget what she had said. She hadn’t meant it. At the time she felt pressured. Tina had begged her to forgive her. But how do you forgive someone so quickly?

     

    We have a history, a long history, Bette thought, a home we even tried for a family. She started to sob again. I won’t end this just now. No, we can’t let it end. I don’t know if I could ever fully trust her though. She couldn’t tell me why she was drinking so much that day, not even a word. She just stood there; I’ve never seen my Tina so empty before. That had scared Bette.

     

    Bette flashed back to the day after they heard the news of the miscarriage. She found Tina on the floor of the kitchen, huddled up, her knees close to her chest, her head resting between them, Tina had been crying. "Baby, it’ll be okay, you’ll see.” Bette had said that while she rubbed Tina’s knees.

     

    Do I think I’m God? Bette cried. I can’t believe I said that. ‘It’ll be okay.’ It’s no wonder Tina didn’t confide in me for help. It’s no wonder she hadn’t opened up to me and told me about her feelings. I know this, all of this, Matt, the sex, the drinking, it all rooted from the miscarriage. Why didn’t I see the signs? I’m so sorry T, I didn’t see it. I should’ve spoken to you about it, about how you were feeling. I thought I was being strong for you.  It’s still no excuse for her shutting me out. Bette thought while shaking her head. I would’ve done anything for her she knows that, she should’ve known that.

     

     

    Bette stood up and walked to the edge of the mountain taking in the scene before her. How ironic, the sun was waning as her heart, her love, Tina was too.

     

    She had come to the mountains to find a gateway; it was the only place that she felt she could truly think for herself. She had made the decision; she was going to follow her heart.  People, their friends, their family would find out and judge them, but who fucking cares? Bette thought. Why should I even care? It’s about me and Tina. It always should’ve been about Tina and me. It was going to be hard, but nothing worth having is easy.

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    Comments

    1. Ahh! Who ate my text?! 😨 Sorry guys, seems like it didn’t upload again. I’ll try again, soon as I get to a laptop bcuz obvs iPhone uploading doesn’t work.

    2. It would b g8 if Bette stopped thinking that Tina was raped or drugged or whatever. Tina could take responsibility & not use the lame xcuse ‘I’ was missing u’ or any such xcuses. Its what happened and its two mature adults. No xcuses no blaming anyone.

    3. Love love love this story!!! Hope T take the blame fully on and Bette to stop finding excuse such as rape, drugs or whtever. But do hope it’ll be enotionally draining…everything should be out in the open, but far away from solved.always was a sucker for heartbroken Bette. Tbx for upload, can’t waut for more!!

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