“Bette, it is way too late at night or I should say, early in the morning for this discussion…”

“No.  No…” her voice trailed off, muttering something before she spoke to Tina again.  “I’m a big *****.  God knows I’ve shown that in the past few months, years even.  I’ll admit that I can be self-involved.”

Tina let out a short laugh.

Bette knew that laugh well.  It was Tina’s sarcastic, ‘you’ve got to be kidding’ chuckle and Bette suddenly resented it.  She was being vulnerable, attempting self-awareness and where was it getting her, a good laugh at her expense and ridicule.  Just a moment before, she had been ready to apologize—again, but now, she felt like she had to defend herself.   “You knew what you were getting when we hooked up, Tina.  You knew I was focused and could have tunnel vision,” Bette said sharply.

“And I accepted that part of you, Bette.”

“Did you?  Really?  I think you thought less of me because of it.  Ego-tripping?  Materialistic? I always sensed that.”  Bette questioned, challenging Tina to say she was incorrect about that assessment.

“Bette, what’s this about?”

“I heard you at Tim’s.  I heard everything you said.  *****, Tina, how could you say that you doubt I ever truly loved you?  And what do you mean you don’t think I’m capable of love.  Do you know what it’s like to hear that?  How could you say that and that I was never able to give you what you needed most?  What didn’t I give?  What did you need that I failed to provide?  How could you say something like that?  What did I do that was so horrible—other than what happened with Candace?  What did I do?”

“Nothing.”

“Tell me the truth,” she requested softly.  “I want to know.”

Tina sighed.  “You know, I understood that you were this go-getter.  I was attracted to that in you.  I liked that you saw something and went after it and I came to realize that sometimes I would have to take a backseat to whatever was your focus at the moment.  When you worked at your gallery I understood the late hours, the long meetings with your accountant, the fights with artists, even with the CAC, I knew that it took a lot of work on your part to be in charge, so I’d wait for you to get home, wait for my turn with you, but once you were there, it was still about you, not us.”