“Tell me about that, Bette?”

“Suzanne, ‘Provocations’ was all about cravings, desires, freedom, passion.  The artists were passionate about there creations.  The art was meant to make the viewer or audience feel—have intense feelings.”

“Provoke?”

“Yes, of course. As I worked to get it together, dealing with ***** from day one with the Board, the censorship, and boycott, I was stressed.  Stressed, but I also started to feel alive for the first time in a very long time.  I felt passionate about the show, but it was wearing me down, draining me.  I needed an outlet for all of these emotions, but I couldn’t go to Tina.  How could I share my excitement when she was still reeling about the baby?  ‘Provocations’ was like my baby.  The baby I was having on my own was thriving despite the obstacles and almost losing it.  What kind of partner would I have been if I had gloated about it?” 

“Maybe Tina would have shared in your joy,” Suzanne suggested.

“She was heartbroken.”

“So were you, Bette.  I saw the interview with Fae Buckley.  I saw what you went through—your honesty and your very real sorrow practically leapt through the television.”

Bette stared at Suzanne suddenly feeling very much on display and like an open book.

“You found a way to transfer some of that sadness to something productive and feel good about it.  It could have been an opportunity to include Tina.  What do you think?”

“No.  No.”

“Why?”

“I needed that just for me.  It was something I needed to hold on to and cherish on my own.”

“But you shared your passion with Candace.”

“It wasn’t about Candace.  That might sound strange, but it wasn’t.  There had been this inertia long before Candace came along, before ‘Provocations.’  I had been tired of the same thing, but over all, I had accepted it as my lot in life.  The gallery days were behind me.  I moved into the next phase of my life—partner and mother.  It was the obvious next step for me.  To have continued as I had been didn’t make sense.  My college friends were married, settling down, raising families.  It was time for me to do the same, but almost immediately, a bit of me died inside.  That was okay.  There was the bigger picture to think about.”