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    You break it, you replace it – Chapter 5

     

    I slept with her twice and while I know in my heart that it was nothing more to me than a brief reprieve from my loneliness, I will never forgive myself for what I did. You are my world Tina and my heart grieves at the pain that my selfishness has caused you. I have become a self fulfilling prophecy. I believed that you deserved more than I could give you and that I was not worthy of your love. Through my infidelity you have come to believe it too. Of course I couldn’t understand of any of this until it was too late. I’ve had countless hours to look at why it all went so horribly wrong. I know that I may be too late but there are some things that I need you to know:

     

    I am wholly to blame for this.

     

    I was wrong to continuously put you second and our relationship third.

     

    I love you with all that I am.

     

    I have been in love with you for seven wonderful years, my desire for you has never and will never fade.

     

    I know that together we are enough for each other.

     

    I know I deserve nothing but your hatred but it is the hope that it will be today that you come home that gives me the strength to face each new day.

     

    There’s so much more that I want to say to you but it needs to happen in person. I’ve been offered a job in Paris and I am flying over to meet the board of directors. The meeting isn’t until next Monday but I’m catching a flight on Friday to spend a couple of days enjoying the city. I’m sure you noticed the ticket with this letter, I hope that you will join me in Paris so we can talk and attempt to repair our relationship. It’s completely on your terms T, please just come with me. I will spend the rest of my days ensuring that you never regret giving me a second chance.

     

    If you’re not with me and I don’t hear from you then I will go to Paris believing that our relationship is broken beyond repair and I should not continue to hope. It will break my heart but if that is the case I plan to accept the job and move to France as soon as possible. I don’t want to leave L.A., my place is here with you but I can’t stay if we’re apart.

     

    The choice is yours now. Please know that I will always love you no matter what you choose.

     

    My heart is yours

    Bette

     

    TBC

    Page 3 of 3123

    Comments

    1. I’m with DL; I wish I had found this earlier. On the bright side, I can read all of it at once without having to wait for psotings! Hee hee! Off I go to the next chap!

    2. this seems just like emotional blackmail to me. unfortunately, although it puts tina between a rock and a hard place in being forced to make a decision based on whether she really wants to lose bette totally, it also could force tina to think that bette is trying to control her again and just let her go without really considering the outcome.

    3. Wow – so revealing! I love the letter although I consider it unfair for Bette to ask Tina to make that decision. It would likely be based on not wanting to lose Bette to Paris than being ready to forgive her and move on. I really like this angle – I’ll be reading your great writing!

    4. What an excellent chapter this was. So right with Bette and her words. But you can’t let us dangle here. We have to know it Tina accepts, or if Bette is moving to Paris? I am amazed on how many excellent stories that we have going on right now with this subject. Thanks

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