Finally, Tina eased away and touched Bette’s face
“I am terrified Bette – I swear that I do not want the two of us to destroy one another again. You “she ran her finger down her cheek “You and I – what the fuck is going to happen “
“I don’t know “Bette whispered “But if this is what it takes to be with you – for us to be together -then it will be worth it “

Breakfast the next morning reminded Tina of so many mornings they had shared when they had been a family. She had come downstairs at 8am – Bette was dressed in her running gear. She was setting the table for three
“Please tell me you haven’t been out already?”
“No – I am going out after Angie has gone to school. How did you sleep?”
Tina shrugged “Not that bad – you?”
“Out like a light “
Tina sat down at the table and picked up the pile of newspapers
“What are the reviews like?”
Bette smiled “Spectacular – amazing – very positive “
“Well done “
“All praise for Pippa “
“You deserve a lot of praise for getting her out of her isolation “
“Not sure if she will thank me”
“She will when she calms “
“That might be another 20 years “Bette replied ironically “Anyway – I will see when she is prepared to speak to me “
“I tried to ring Carrie last night “
“And?”
Tina laughed bitterly “The number doesn’t exist anymore “
“Fuck – she doesn’t hang about “Bette exclaimed
“No – well I know that she ended a four-year relationship when her lover forgot her birthday. She just ghosted her – she didn’t think it was unusual”
About THREE different replies came into Bette’s mind -like what a fucking whack job and who the fuck does that and you have had such a lucky escape Tina.

Maturity had taught her how to bite her tongue. This was her last chance to have a last chance with Tina. They did need some tough conversations – but things were too raw for both of them – they would both need to get their heads around what had happened less than 24 hours earlier.
“What would you like for breakfast?”
“Just tea and cereal “
“If you look in the cupboard above the microwave you can take your pick – there are about five options “
Tina smiled “You spoil her “
“Its only breakfast cereal “
“You still spoil her “
“I am allowed to “Bette replied
Bette poured two cups of coffee and sat down and looked at Tina – it was odd to have her around so early, but it was nice. If it as going to be a regular event there would have to be a lot of work – a lot
“How do you feel today “Tina asked
Bette shrugged “Still taking it all in – there have been so monumental nights in our history – that one is in the top five “
Tina nodded “Yes “
“Made more mind blowing because no one saw it coming “
Tina rubbed her hair “Carrie was building up to that “
Bette raised an eyebrow “Really “
Tina nodded “She couldn’t deal with you “
“Is that my fault?”
Tina smiled “No – I can blame you for a lot of shit but no – you are you “
“I know you got angry with me but “Bette sipped her coffee “We didn’t have to be best friends “
“I could never see the two of you as friends “
“Did you want that?”
“It wasn’t going to happen – all I hoped was that you would be civil “
“I was civil “Bette protested
Tina raised her eyebrow – Bette held her hands up
“I was mostly civil “
“Family therapy?” Tina challenged
“Okay “
“It was a very difficult morning “
“It was – I was at my worst, and she did press my buttons “
“Morning “Angie came into the kitchen and smiled – it was good to see them together. Would they find their way back to one another? should they?
“Hello sweetie “Tina got up and hugged her daughter
“How are you mom?”
Tina nodded – she was still raw from what had happened but just seeing Angie would always make things better regardless of her own feelings
“Would you like to hang out with me after school?” Angie asked
“Do you have anything in mind?”
Angie shrugged “Anything you want – go for a walk or anything “
Bette walked out of the kitchen – Tina watched her go – she still moved so beautifully. Bette did just everything beautifully. Angie took hold of her mom’s hand
“Is it really over with Carrie?”
Tina nodded “he just couldn’t deal well with my past “
“You mean mom?”
Tina considered the question “No – not mom. she couldn’t deal with me having an ex-wife – it wasn’t Bette – it was who Bette represented. We all come with emotional baggage – maybe her reaction to Bette happened quicker than it would with anyone else”
“Well mom is mom “Angie replied with a raised eyebrow
“She is – and she is loving, and kind and we are lucky to have her “
Angie obviously weighed up her next comment “So what is happening with the two of you?”
“I just didn’t want to go back to the house Carrie, and I shared that’s all “
Tina was not 100% sure if Angie believed her – or if it was unfair to expect her to be mature enough to grasp just how complicated her mother’s relationship was. Tina needed thinking time and she needed another adult as a sounding board – well that ruled out Alice even before she had jetted off on her book tour. And Tina needed to know what Shane had found out from Carrie on the night that her and Tess had helped her get home. And why the fucking hell had Shane – Shane of all people in the world had picked yesterday to tell Bette that Carrie was having doubts about the wedding.
“I just want you to be happy mom “Angie echoed Bette’s words
“I know that honey “
“And Carrie made you happy “
Angie was struggling to understand
“She did – but obviously I didn’t make her happy or she wouldn’t have cared about Bette “
“But mom is mom and “Angie paused – when she was in this mood Tina could see what Bette meant about Angie being Tina’s daughter
“And mom is a lot “Angie concluded
“And as I just said – she is a lot of amazing things “
“Do you love her?”
“Angie – we will never not love one another “
That wasn’t what Angie meant and Tina knew that – in truth Tina was going to need time to figure out her feelings. Carrie had ghosted her – she would never hear from her again and that hurt – regardless of everything she felt she deserved more than what was obviously happening with Carrie. And then Bette still had to face Pippa – the woman Tina knew that she was obsessed with – another complication….
Bette came back into the kitchen and fussed over Angie and Tina. Tina loved this Bette – the loving mom – the really good parent. All too soon Bette was pushing Angie out of the door with homework and hugs and everything else that their daughter would need for school, left alone Bette filled her water bottle with icy water before putting three keys on a fob on the table
“Keys for you – I do not want to crowd you – we both have to process what happened yesterday. I am giving you space but please do not take space to mean indifference or apathy. I know what I am and how I come across and yes, we both know I can be a bad ass bitch at times. But “Bette stopped to take a breath “Have no doubts about this – I love every fibre of your being Tina. I will do what it takes to not tell you that I have changed but to show you. But you have to give me that same thing in return Tina – if I am going to open myself up again, I have to know that you will not destroy me like you did when you left us – I couldn’t take that again. It would destroy me, and I don’t know how many times I can put myself together again before I become permanently damaged goods. Take as long as you need but we both have to be committed to wanting to rebuild our love. I know you are worth it – I hope you think that I am “
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