Alice was sitting at her desk, head in hand, hurting a bit from too much Cuervo the night before. She even had to leave the Mini at Milk. OK, so maybe Cuervo wasnt a good idea the night before a big meeting. Bless the taxi industry – she was at least able to get her new boss home in one piece. Now she had to meet Julia to see if her job was still there. Maybe I should have left her with Shane a little longer. That would have loosened her up some.

Alice was startled out of her thoughts by her phone ringing. She looked down at the caller ID and saw Shanes house. For the first time, Alice wasnt too comfy picking up a call from Shane, mainly because she wasnt sure if it was Shane or Dana. She debated a bit too long as she went to finally answer the call, she saw that it said, 1 missed call. As she got ready to check voice mail, the phone started ringing again. This time was Shanes cell phone.

Hey, Shane.

Hey, Al. Guess you were busy ten seconds ago? Or did you think it was Dana?

Rolling her eyes at Shanes comment, Cut me some slack here. My head is killing me and I wasnt up for some love sick sentiment this morning. OK?

Yeah, yeah, Al. Listen, I was just calling to wish you luck with your meeting.

Wait – I dont remember telling you about my meeting this morning. Did I? Suddenly realizing that if she didnt remember this, what else didnt she remember from last night?

Relax Al. Bette told me.

Feeling a little better, Whew. I knew I had one or two shots too many, but I didnt think I was drunk enough for blackouts. Just drunk enough to be hating myself right now that I have to go function in front of Julia, who I was dumb enough to drink with. Think shes hurting too Shane?

Sorry. Youre on your own there. She wasnt too bad last night. Listen, I have to leave for the shop. I have a client in a half an hour, just wanted to say good luck. Kick some ***** in there Pieszecki.

Thanks Shane. Ill let you know how it goes. Bye. As Alice put her head down on her desk, her cell phone rang again. Without looking at it, she grabbed it, Forget something Yoda??

Al? Is that you?

*****, I didnt look at the caller ID this time Dane? Whats up? I have a meeting in like four minutes, I dont have time to talk right now.

I know Alice, thats why Im calling. Just wanted to tell you I was thinking of you and I know itll go great. You always do great.

What did Porter tell everyone about this?

No, Al. You told me last night. Remember, when we said good night?

Alice was getting a sinking feeling. She didnt like where this was heading. I told you about this? You sure Dana? I dont think so.

Yeah, Im sure. We were right outside of Milk, waiting for the cab. We had this whole conversation because you didnt want a ride from me, you dont remember this?

Oh, yeah, yeah, I remember. Well thanks for calling Dana, but I really have to go.

Wait, Al, wait a sec. Dana was desperate to keep her on the line.

What? I really need to go. Ill call you later. OK? Ill let you know what happens. But I cant be late. Its bad enough Im hungover.

Dana hesitated a second, then shyly said, Wait, I just wanted to say thank you for last night. It means a lot to me.

Alice was now racking her brain. She remembered the bathroom conversation, but there wasnt anything to thank her for in that. Maybe just for hanging out and not causing a scene? This wasnt the time to figure it out.

No problem Dane, but I really gotta go Talk to you later. Before Dana could say anything, the line went dead. No problem, last night it was a ***** of a problem? She didnt think she would get Alice to say yes. Maybe shes doing better with it now.

Alice put her head down at the desk and looked at her watch out of the corner of her eyes. Two minutes. She forced her body to stand up, resting her hands on the desk for a little support as she stood. Grabbing some articles, she walked out of her office, ready to go face the firing squad.

———-

Shane was working on her 9:45 appointment when her cell phone rang. She ignored it the first time it rang. After about thirty seconds, it rang again. Hey, Im sorry. Can you give me one minute?

Sure Shane.

Thanking the woman as she stepped away from the chair, she looked down at the caller ID and saw the familiar 917 number, Tina? Hey! I have someone in my chair. Is everything ok?

Well good morning to you too. Since you said it was important that I get out there, I figured Id call with my flight information.

As a huge grin spread across her face, So youre coming T?!?! Thank you. I cant wait to see you. When are you coming in?

Were catching a flight tomorrow morning. We leave NY at 10am and into LAX at noon, your time.

I will be there and we can drop your stuff by the house.

No, Shane, you already have Dana there. I booked a hotel. You dont need the two of us there.

Listen, Ill argue with you about this in person. I need to get back to my customer.

Alright Shane, Ill email you the flight number and information. Talk to you later.

Later T, Shane said, getting ready to hang up, Oh and T

What hon?

Thanks. It means a lot.

You dont have to thank me, you were right. Its been too long since Ive been home, but I hope you know what youre doing. Im not exactly the perfect example of healthy relationships.

Dont you worry about that, I know what Im doing. Love you T.

Love you too. See you tomorrow.

———-

Alice was sitting on the couch outside of Julias office, waiting to be called in. After waiting for about five minutes, she was called in.

Julia was sitting behind her desk, she looked way to refreshed for Alices taste. Her hair was perfect, make up perfect, no bags under her eyes. As Alice grunted to herself, Julia said, Good Morning Alice. I was waiting for a call that you were late. Im impressed youre here.

Yeah well, first official meeting with the new boss, I figured hung over was better than late. She said as she plopped into the chair across from Julia.

Julia smiled at her, Im glad youre here. And thank you for last night. I had a good time. You have a great group of friends.

Yeah, theyre great. Listen Julia, I dont want to disrespect you here, but my head is killing me. And well, you were there. I dont need to explain it to you. Im pretty anxious about what’s going to happen here. Can we get to the work stuff and if I still have a job, we can talk about my friends? Ill be in a much more conversational mood, you know?

Julia just laughed, Of course Alice. She looked down at her desk and pulled out a folder from under a pile of other papers. So, you have been writing a lot of Best Of columns and fluff pieces about the LA scene.

Alice didnt like the way this was starting off. It didnt seem to be going too well, Yeah, well, trying to keep things hip and fresh with our youth…

Alice, I didnt finish my sentence. Can I finish? Relax.

Sorry Julia, Im just a bit on edge.

I know. This is not the type of meeting anyone likes. Going through some of the papers in the folder, she says to Alice, So did you bring me two of your column you thought were your best?

Alice handed the papers to Julia, Yeah, here you go. One I wrote a few years ago about the Best Valentines Non Traditional Day Gifts. I interviewed a bunch of random people to ask what they thought was the best gift they had ever gotten. Then looking up and Julia and smiling added, Then I edited those results and took only the non traditional gifts. Like, no candy or flowers or jewelry in this. It turned into a funny, sweet article. The other one is the one due today. The Best Break-Up Cures I could get into it. Alice felt her eyes filling up, so she shook her head and smiled. So what do you think? Good right? Of course right. You know you need me around here.

Alice, can I read them first? Julia had said, not even looking up from the papers. After a few minutes of what Alice thought was excruciating silence, Julia finally spoke.

So Alice, these are what you find to be your best?

Well, yeah, Julia, they sort of represent me and the type of work Ive been doing here really well.

The one you delivered today was great Alice. Very insightful, emotional, real, especially since it is supposed to be a fluff piece. Someone must have seriously broken your heart at some point.

Trying to laugh it off, Yeah, well all those cheesy love em and get your heart crushed movies, can teach you empathy. The eighties were filled with them.

Julia handed a piece of paper to Alice from her desk, What is this?

Alice looked over the piece of paper and got an embarrassed grin on her face as she recognized the sheet, Oh, this. I, uh, just wrote this in a fit of anger. We had already dealt with 8 years of George W and the Democrats couldnt come up with a candidate for the 2008 election. So I just went off in an editorial. I never thought it was going to get published, I was just venting.

Julia smiled at her, This is your best piece. It was funny, smart, well written. It had the details required to educate, but written with a humor and in a manner to let the everyday reader understand it and want more of it.

Oh, thanks. Its not really my typical, you know, it just came out one day.

Well Alice, Im going to give you a choice here. I think your talents are wasted on the fluff pieces that you write. Like I said, I am planning on making changes here. So here is your choice. You can start a new column, sort of in the style of Pretzel Logic (a personal favorite of mine from the Philadelphia CityPaper, by Howard Altman) based on substance and real issues, but written with your, um, lets call it sarcastic flair. Or I will write you a recommendation for to whatever place you want to go to next. But here, I cant have you keep on your current track. If you decide against the column, Ill give you six weeks to find somewhere to go, but I dont want anymore fluff from you.

Alice was taking in what she was hearing and trying to digest it. She knew she didnt want to leave here, but to write a monthly editorial, not her style. When Julia realized that Alice was responding, she kept on talking, Alice, I think you have been wasting an amazing talent and a voice that the public wants to hear. You are better than you give yourself credit for. How about this? Next Monday the Senate starts its confirmation hearings on the new Supreme Court Justice. Go to DC for a week or two. Cover the hearings, write a column about it. See what you think then. I need a copy of it on my desk in one month from today. What do you think?

***** – politics – I hate being serious, but, DC? Hmmm. A couple of weeks away cant be a bad thing. It will get me out of Dodge for a while. Clear my head. Give Dana time to see whats its like to not have me around.

Alice put her hand across the table, to shake Julias hand, Deal. Ill leave Sunday night. Thank you! Maybe a change of pace is what I need.


—————————


Alice went back into her office and got her things and left, heading for the Planet. She needed a little caffeine and her car. As she walked in, she saw Bette and Robin sitting at a table in the corner. She got her caffeine fix and walked over to them.

Hey guys. Porter, what are you doing outside of work in the middle of the day?

Just having lunch with my girl. I dont need to ask about you, you spend more time out of the office than unemployed people.

Youre just jealous that Im not chained to my job, Porter. Robin, how are you?

Im good Alice. How did your meeting go? Bette told me about it.

Is there anyone you didnt tell Bette? Bette just shrugged her shoulders at Alice, I didnt think it was a secret, so how did it go? Are you still amongst the gainfully employed?

Yes I am, thank you very much. Like anyone would think they could replace me, ha! Alice looked at her friends and smiled at them, Actually, it was pretty interesting. She proceeded to tell them about the conversation with Julia.

Good for you Alice. Shes right you know? You are better than you let yourself think. Its like youre scared of succeeding. Im glad she realized it. Maybe you will now. And that column was great. Bette continued, chuckling to herself, What did you call him, an example of the destruction of the American Society or something like that?

Ha, actually I called him the perfect representation of the dumbing down of America.

Robin started laughing, Cute Alice. Dana must be really proud of you. What did she say?

Alice started biting her lip and looking down at the table, Shes, uh, still at practice. I havent had a chance to tell her yet.

Im sure she is going to be really happy for you, but shes going to miss you. Shes the one who travels for work, with all of the tours. Im sure its going to be hard for her to be the one at home alone, waiting for you to come back.

Not too hard, Im sure. Alice mumbled to herself, but apparently loud enough for Bette to hear. Bette, looked over at Alice and put her hand onto hers, Whats going on Alice, and dont give me that ***** youve been trying to feed me.

Alice pulled her hand away, You know Porter, you really know how to spoil a mood. She looked away from the table and started staring at the wall, Fine, you want to know whats going on, Dana left. She said she cant do this anymore. Its too hard, shes scared of losing me totally from her life. So five years, yes five ***** years later, she wants to go back to being best friendsFeel better now that you know, cause, I dont feel any better for having told you.

Robin and Bette looked at each other with their jaws a bit open. Alice, Im sure shell come to her senses. She loves you. You know that, she knows that, anyone in the room with the two of you knows that. Itll be ok.

Robin, I appreciate the good thoughts, but keep them, ok? Nothing personal, I dont want to talk about it. You asked what was wrong, I told you. End of conversation, finito, complete, no more. Get it?

Bette leaned over to Robin and whispered into her ear, Baby, can you give us a few minutes? I just want to talk to her.

Getting up from the table, Robin, Im going to go get some more coffee, and say hi to Kit. Ill be back in a few. You guys want something?

My life back? Oh wait, Kit doesnt sell that. Nothing for me.

No thanks baby. Robin walked up to the counter to find Kit.

OK Alice, talk to me.

Which part of finito did you not understand? Im done talking Bette.

You are so stubborn sometimes, I could slap you. Look at me. Slowly, Alice raised her eyes to meet her friends. When Bette hadnt started to speak, Alice just raised her eyebrows up in question.

Bette rolled her eyes at her friend and began talking, So let me make sure I understand this. Dana left? Did she move out? Alice nodded. And you are picking now to go to DC and work on an article. Did you learn nothing from me? Didnt my mistakes show you anything?

You cant compare this Bette. Its not the same. I didnt do anything to Dana for her to want to leave. Im not the one that should be fighting to keep it. I am NOT going to be that person.

What person Alice, the one who fights for what she wants?

No, the person who collapses as soon as she is dumped. The person who begs someone to stay with them. The person who needs to explain to her partner of five years, no wait, almost six years, why this is something worth fighting for. If she doesnt get it by now, she never will. And I am not going to wait with bated breath for her to come to her senses and put my life on hold. She knows that I love her. She knows what I want from her. I am not going to become that person who has to convince someone to come back to her. If she needs to be convinced, I dont want it.

Bette considered what Alice had said for a second before answering, Dont you think you are being harsh? Just a bit. I was at your house this past weekend, and she was with you, so she couldnt be gone that long. Something must have freaked her out. Give her time to settle down. Bette wasnt going to just let this go, she knew first hand how bad of an idea this was, I didnt fight for Tina. She said she needed space, I gave it. We tried dinner once, she said she was leaving and I did nothing. Nothing Al! I never should have let her go. You know that. You argued with me about it. We sat at your apartment, getting way too drunk, and you yelled at me for hours for just giving up. Do you remember that?

Of course I remember that. But this is different. I dont want to hurt you Bette, but you caused that. You betrayed your wife. I didnt do a ***** thing. I just loved her, completely, totally, wholly and with all of me. And she left. So, no, this is not the same thing.

I dont care about the reason. I let the love of my life get on a plane. When she extended her three month trip to six, I did nothing. I felt bad for myself, I thought I deserved it, so I let her go. You yelled at me again. You even gave me her address, against her wishes, so that I could go get her. But I didnt go. I figured the least I could do was give her time and space and she would come home. Well, its been over five years and she still hasnt set foot in California. Looking over at Robin, and feeling a little guilty, Dont get me wrong. I love Robin. She has been so good to me. She knows that I will always love Tina and she has accepted that. But Alice, I let my true love go. Dont be as stubborn as I was. Dont do it to yourself. Dont let yourself wake up to a wonderful, amazing woman, who just happens to not be Dana, and regret the decisions in your life. You dont deserve that. And neither will the person you have taking her place.

Alice was lost in her thoughts. She was sad, but she was also getting angry. Alice had always known about Danas insecurities. It was actually something she found really sweet. It had amazed her that Dana never gave in to that whole celebrity thing. Thinking she was all that. Dana always felt like the shy, unsure person she was when Alice first met her. She never saw what everyone else did when they looked at Dana, a stunningly beautiful, sweet, caring, funny woman, with a heart of gold. It was something that Alice found so endearing and she worked hard to never let Dana have any doubts about how she felt. But then again, Alice never considered it work. It was natural. It was like she was born to love Dana, it came so easily.

But even through all of that love, Dana finally gave in to her insecurities. To Alice, it wasnt just that she doubted their love, but she doubted who Alice was, as a person. That she could ever think that Alice would just walk away and hurt her. And what did it mean if Dana was willing to walk away? What did it say for Alice or for what Dana felt for Alice?

Resigned in her anger, Well you know what Bette? I dont deserve this either. I did nothing to deserve this. I have taken care of that woman and loved her and supported her and laughed with her. I have shared her joys and cried when she shed a tear. And her answer to all of that was to say ***** You. Thanks for all the good times, but I gotta go. But hey, lets be friends. That ***** does not fly with me. Bette, I understand what you are saying, I understand where you are coming from. But I am going to DC. This I can control. I can make sure that I have a career, but I cant do much with Dana. Its all in her hands. Let her figure out what to do. Im done trying. As she was wrapping up her tirade, her cell phone rang. What!

Whoa! Alice – its Shane. Whats your problem? Meeting with Julia not go well?

Alice took a deep breath and sighed, Sorry Shane. No the meeting went fine. Im just talking to Bette and I got a little worked up. Whats up?

Youre ok though?

Yeah, Im fine. Im sick of everyone asking me that, but Im fine. Whats up?

Can you come to the Planet tomorrow, about 2 oclock?

I should be able to. Why, whats going on?

Nothing, youll see when I get there. Hey, you said you were talking to Bette? Is she there?

Yeah, do you want to talk to her?

No, no, listen, can you not say anything to her about tomorrow?

I guess, but why?

Dont worry, youll understand tomorrow. Just dont say anything, ok?

Fine. No problem. Ill talk to you later Shane. Bye.

Bette looked over at Alice, Shane was looking for me?

No, no, Alice was trying to think of something to say, She, uh, she just wanted to make sure I wasnt alone. Shes annoying like that. All overprotective and Yoda like.

Oh, well, thats Shane. She always takes care of the people that she loves. Smiling about her friends goodness, Alice, Im sorry if I upset you. I heard everything you said. You are right to feel hurt and angry. But dont let your pride get in the way. Promise me youll at least think about it. Or if nothing else, at least talk to Dana before you leave.

Yeah, yeah. Ill tell her Im leaving, that make you feel better?

No, but its a start. Bette said, with her standard huge smile, You never could ignore my advice.

Yeah – whatever Porter. I just like to appease you. I know your swollen ego couldnt take it if I ignored you to your face. Alice got up to leave, Im going to home and get some well deserved sleep, go tell Robin she can come back now.

Youll be ok, you know?

Im always ok, Porter, dont you forget that!!