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    Diary of a Mad Addict . . . Chapter 31

    Story written on November 12, 2005 by T6beach.
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    24 votes, average: 3.50 out of 524 votes, average: 3.50 out of 524 votes, average: 3.50 out of 524 votes, average: 3.50 out of 524 votes, average: 3.50 out of 5 (24 votes, average: 3.50 out of 5)
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    Character(s): N/A
    Number of Comments: 12
    Words: 3609
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=57595
    Author Notes:

    Impatience is not a virtue and wisdom does not necessarily develop with age.


    (AUTHOR’S NOTE: It is said that we writers write what we know. I know that I am not a writer, but I like to tell a story. In fact, sometimes I weave a web of truth and fiction so well intertwined and convincing that even I cant tell where tale begins and the truth ends. But I can tell you all this truth . . . I have had more fun spinning this Diary and sharing my L-related experiences than I have had writing any other piece of literature.)

     

    SUMMARY: For those of you who have not followed this diary, you will neither understand what is happening nor like the story. It is not a Bette and Tina drama-filled sage. It is merely an account of a predicament I found myself in because of my addiction to everything L. I cannot go back and bring you up to speed on all the craziness in my life up to this point – -my dog, my ***** neighbors, my shrink, my ER doctor, my cybersex text messaging mystery woman, my death, the Stooges, my constant visions of Bette Porter, or the perpetual suffering I endure due to an incurable and untreatable addiction to everything L, but I can tell you this much . . . . after accusing my wife of cheating on me and giving me herpes, she shackled me, literally, to the bathroom towel rack with a pair of handcuffs and left me there for several hours. She really didn’t give me herpes and she really didn’t cheat on me, but when I heard the voice of my shrink on our answering machine planning a clandestine rendezvous with K, my suspicions were incorrectly confirmed. I was crushed, devastated at the thought of my wife and my therapist “getting it on” . I hopped on my motorcycle, leaving K, before I realized that the two most important women in my life were plotting and planning a surprise birthday for me . . . . )

     

    If I were a drinker, I would have been looking for a bar . . one of those a redneck, rough and tough, straight-up-whiskey-and-beer-chasin open-all-night kind of bars. If I were a smoker, I would have been chain dragging Marlboro Reds one right after the other, most definitely inhaling. If I were a junkie, I would have been huntin down my dealer and smoking or snortin or shootin or swallowin whatever I could find to ease the pain.

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    Comments

    4. Awesome chapter there beach. I am too addicted to the beloved Sea but I also look forward to your work as well. don’t keep up waiting so long next time.

    5. i know you probably didn’t feel funny, but it was hilarious, especially vision of bette and the need for a donut and B&T porn-like sex fan fic…thanks, i haven’t laugh like that for quite long time

    7. She’s alive!!!! I saw your name and just about fell out of my chair! There are so many over the top, hilarious lines in this chapter, I would have to just retype the whole thing in the comment box in order to make sure I got them all. This is pure T6Beach…and it doesn’t get any funnier than that! Talk with you soon!

    8. Beachie, it is so good to see a chapter from you and an honor to be mentioned in it. This chapter was so damn funny and it put me in such a great mood that I will be smiling all day. Take care and thanks again for writing this chapter for us.

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