So you’d said, out of the clear blue, “There’s one kind of fuck you still haven’t given me Aerin.”

Everyone’s mouths dropped, including the doctor’s, who was visiting at that time, and the nurse’, who was tucking fresh sheets on your bed. But I laughed. I knew what you were referring to right away.

So I answered, “Well, if these good people would just clear the room and give us some privacy I’d be happy to fix that right now.”

I think that shocked everyone even more, as their mouths dropped again, and this time stared at me like I had two heads.

And then I teared-up, when I bent down and whispered into your ear, “But it’s never, ever, going to be a mercy fuck when you and I make love, Christina. So, c’mon and get well already, and then we can go home.”

When I straightened up, and gazed one last time into your sapphire eyes, you rasped out. “I’m trying, baby. But in case I can’t, promise me you’ll find somebody.”

And with that, all hell broke loose, as your blood pressure dropped, and everything started beeping, and people started screaming for help, while Jules and Diane were tearing me away from your bedside.

So I never got to give you a last kiss before your life slipped away, my love.

That was five months ago. And today’s the anniversary of the first night we made love. On this wonderful, comfortable bed.

For that reason alone, I can’t bring myself to get rid of this bed or sell this place. I haven’t sold a single lamp, table, or wine goblet. They all bear your stamp, your style, your grace, your life.

I’m the sole resident of both apartments of the penthouse level now, and people are telling our friends that the elevator could soon grow rusty from lack of use. Given that it’s dedicated to the residents of the penthouse floor. Which would be lil’ ol’me. And I don’t get around much.

What would be the point?

I know Jules knows the meaning of this day because she’s dragging everyone to come over. For a get-together, she says. They’ll be here soon, I think. I dunno. I’ve lost track of time. She has the keys to the place, anyway. And your card to the elevator. Hope that’s okay with you. I got tired of standing up every time she or Diane or anybody else came by to visit. So I gave our friends keys to our place.