With shaky self-possession and clarity, I tried to process several things at once.

I knew that Bella expected me to trust her love for me; particularly after all we had been through. She had even pursued circuitous measures to secure an eternity with me, and although she had not necessarily agreed to marry me, she had agreed to give me more time, a year of college or two, time that I intended to press along much further. I also knew that Bella did not possess a talent for self-preservation, this was obvious, and thereby any promises of…life…that Jacob held might not be tempting.

It would be logical to conclude that if she were to choose Jacob Black, it would mean that she loved him more, desired him more, and felt the need for him more than she did for me. If this were the case, then the feelings she’d expressed for me would have been disingenuous on some level.

Impossible. I was absolutely certain that Bella did truly have a firm will. She was honest. She did not always truly grasp her decisions until they were made, but once she made them, she was unshakably loyal to her cause.

I was also forced to consider the other evidence lingering around in my mind: “miss” did not equate “love”. Alice's visions were open to interpretation…

Alice had also seen Bella gazing at my eyes as she took in the rich scent of a bouquet of roses, wedding roses to be precise.

Alice had seen Bella awaking to immortality, Bella in Alaska, Bella hunting with me with her eyes a red glow. Those visions could change, yes.

But for now, I allowed myself to be invigorated by hope. As soon as I’d reached my conclusion, I felt ashamed to have been so easily discouraged.

“The way I feel about you can never change, Edward. Of course I love you – and there’s nothing you can do about it!”

I took another deep breath and steadied myself.

So many emotions still invaded my mind; relief, uncertainty, shame, and understanding. How could I have been so incredibly weak? Italy changed everything. Italy. The remembrance of her warmth as she slammed into me appeared in a rush of conflicting feelings. Her scent as it swirled in the air, her frantic words fraught with fear, determination, and concern. Concern for me. Concern for us, our future.