As if right on cue, Alice’s vision that was lingering in the back of my mind since I'd seen his thoughts that day in the woods flashed forward:

A smiling, radiant, slightly pregnant Bella sitting on a sandy beach. She was still pale, but with a perfect blush on her cheeks, her long dark hair swinging as she bent down to pick up something. In the vision, she smiled sweetly, her eyes tired from the strain of pregnancy.

When I’d seen the vision for the first time, it had hit me so hard I nearly stumbled. The possibility of her choosing Jacob Black and life was legitimate, possible. Of course, very quickly, the vision had disappeared. Alice had immediately resumed her recitation of the first twelve tenets of Hammurabi’s Code, but I had still seen it.

I tried to push the memory away now. That was hardly what I needed at the moment if I hoped to retain any shred of sanity. If I were to show up flustered, she would know. How could I face her? How could I explain myself? No, it was too shameful. I took a left turn down the main street. The driving helped as I considered my options.

I knew that I was still prepared to love her for the remainder of her human life. I would eventually lose her to death, disease or old age, but if she chose Jacob Black, I knew she would live fully. If she chose Jacob, I could still fulfill that plan. I could always be here, waiting, perhaps watching her life through Alice’s mind. This solution didn’t feel like rationalization thought, it felt like acceptance.

Jacob’s image of the two of them sharing a smile in his garage flew into my mind. I winced as grief and unfathomable frustration began to swarm in.

I passed the first set of buildings, which preceded the town square, and felt my mind buzz with the overwhelming pull of my emotions. I pulled over. Sliding onto the shoulder, I parked and focused on the large, green, moss-covered rock that was directly in front of my headlights.

I took a deep breath and quickly cleared my thoughts.

The hollow returned.

I was momentarily dazed beyond comprehension.

I needed control. Stop. Control yourself. Starting over with this thought process would be best. Too much emotion, these are not decisions to be made too hastily. Rational thought is fundamental. Utilize the last remaining nine minutes wisely…