I listen to the words of the song playing.

            “I smile at her, but it’s not her face I see.  I whisper to her softly, but the words are not for her.  I stay with her, but the love’s not true.  I still think of you.”

            I make a decision.  I am going after her.  I would rather try and fail than spend the rest of my life wondering ‘what if’.  My mind is reeling.  I don’t know where to begin.  I don’t even know if she is still living in Orlando, which is where she had moved when she left.  

~

            “Spence, look at me.”  She held my hands in hers and spoke softly trying to keep me from bursting out with anger again.  I looked at her with contempt. 

            “I need to do this Spence and I am not sure I can get through it without you.  Please come with me.”

            “I have a job and friends here Ashley; this is where I want to be.”

            “You can be a reporter in Florida too.  It is just for a year, then I will have a contract with this company and then we can move wherever we want.  We can come back to the city.”

            “If this is something you have to do, then pack your things and go, but I am not coming with you.”  I stood and crossed my arms across my chest.  I knew I was being irrational, but I didn’t care.  She couldn’t expect me to drop everything and move for her.  I had a promising job and I liked it here.  Her eyes showed nothing but devastation.  She was shell shocked by my reaction and was now at a complete loss for words.  She simply shook her head and walked out of the bedroom.  I continued to stand there and moments later I heard the front door open and then close. 

            I laid in bed waiting for her to come home.  I sat there in the dark, in all my stubbornness, set in my decision.  I glanced over at the clock, 3:23 am.  I began to wonder if she even was going to come home.  Within minutes, I heard the door again.  She walked into the kitchen and I heard her open the refrigerator, no doubt drinking the orange juice out of the carton.  I wasn’t sure I was ready to deal with any kind of verbal interaction, so I closed my eyes when she entered the room. She filled the room with the remnants of cigarette smoke and alcohol.  Well, at least I knew she had been out drinking.