Ashley Ashley Ashley she heard her name in pleas spilling from her lover’s lips but she wouldn’t listen and shrugged the tender hands off her body. “What’s wrong with me?” She lifted her face from her hands and stared at Spencer through her tears. The blonde reached out brushing her fingers through her bangs with her own tears. “I’m sorry.” Ashley sniffled finally allowing the blonde’s arms to wrap around her, too exhausted to keep fighting them off. Eyes closed, she was 12 years old again hating herself for hurting Spencer and ashamed of liking it. “I’m so sorry I hurt you.”

“You didn’t hurt me.” The words were whispered. “I promise.”

“Are you sure?” She whimpered wanting to look into her face but too tired to move from the warmth of the body holding her. “Because Michael really hurt me and I did that to you. I…did that to you. Why?”

“Because you love me.”

Ashley frowned at the response staring blankly at the far wall, her mind muddled with confusion and ecstasy. The closeness was too much, she was feeling it again, and for some reason she really wanted to kiss her friend. Horrified, her mind told her to leave but her body wouldn’t listen. Leaning into the blonde felt too good. “No I don’t.” She smiled against the soft material of her shirt. “I don’t love you.” The hand running through her hair paused and the body holding her tensed.

“You don’t mean that.”

The brunette suddenly felt sad. It was a familiar feeling when hurting her friend with harsh words. But it was the right thing to do. Keep Spencer as far away as possible. She wasn’t good enough to speak the truth. I love you……Spencer deserved better. “You don’t know anything.”

She wanted to leave, hop in her car and disappear. It didn’t feel right. Nothing felt good. Moving slowly in attempt to free herself from loving arms, she slid down the blonde’s body not getting very far. With wide open eyes, the brunette turned over lying on her back with her head in the blonde’s lap peering up into blue eyes. They were puffy, wet, and breath taking. “What don’t I know, Ash. Tell me.”

Ashley saw her lips moving forming the words before she heard them and too caught up memorizing the small details of her lover’s face, she didn’t understand. Nothing made any sense. Why was Spencer crying? “Tell you what?”