“I do not call Edward ‘Eddie’, Lauren. I don’t know if he’d care if I did or not—he probably won’t care—but I’m not going to call him ‘Eddie’ because I know he hates the nickname, and personally, I hate it too. And as for Serena . . . She can call him whatever she wants. She’s going to be completely spoiled by him. I know that for sure,” I said and Edward smiled and nodded his head vigorously in agreement. Lauren completely ignored me.

“Come on, Edward! I’m sure your wife and daughter can manage on their own.” She sneered again. This time when she said ‘wife’ and ‘daughter.’ This girl is really asking to be faced with the wrath of the newborn. My thought made me want to laugh, but I suppressed it. “I just want to catch up on old times,” she said. As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Serena let out a baby-growl. She stared at Lauren and then something totally sudden and unexpected happened. “No, I don’t. I want to steal you away from Bella! And also from your stupid daughter!” she said super-fast. If I wasn’t a vampire, I doubt I would’ve been able to catch it all. Her hands flew to her mouth and she let out a string of profanities. “Please, forget I said that!” she begged.

“No, Lauren. I don’t think I can forget that you want me to leave my beloved wife and daughter for you!” This time, Edward sneered. At the last word. Which was ‘you.’ Which was talking about Lauren. Again, my thought made me want to laugh. Again, I suppressed it. “I think it would be best if you left before I say any other rude things.”

Lauren let out a loud “humph” and stormed out of the front door.

I couldn’t contain my laughter any longer. I laughed and laughed and laughed and soon, Edward joined in. Serena giggled. It was as if she understood what was going on. And for a second, I thought that maybe she did.

“Edward, you didn’t have to do that,” I said as soon as I stopped laughing. “It was rude! Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad she’s gone, but still!”

“Well, she can’t expect to be treated nicely after talking badly about the two most important things in my life,” he said softly, then brushed my cheek with his fingers. If I were human, I would have been cherry red right now.