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#10 Touch Tones: Alice Surmises
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Molly interrupts, ”That I can understand.”
When we stop at a traffic light I continue, ”…thinking she’s found her Great Love in the alternate universe of gay West Hollywood. That’s absolutely not my story. I would have never done such a thing.”
”But it’s set in The Planet that your sister owns. You go there all the time, and it’s Shane’s roommate’s script? And they live next door to you.”
”What is this? Lesbian GPS? Look, I told you already. It’s a story about Jenny.” I press my hands earnestly against my chest to emphasize. ”That’s what I’m explaining.”
”But Shane’s in it?”
”Molly, listen to me. Shane’s not an actress. Shane’s working on the movie.”
”The movie Tina is producing. Yeah, I got that much. So you and Shane and Tina are not in this movie?”
”Correct. Don’t believe everything you hear, Molly. Especially at CU, but especially CU. It’s is an fetid little place for rumors, and …” I stop myself suddenly.
”Gossip about my mother?”
”Molly, probably. Yes. People are probably talking about your mother – now that she’s come out.”
”Is that typically what lesbians do Bette, when you guys come out? I mean, Mother throws a big party, and her guests respond by taking off their bras in a conga line around our pool. Is that normal? I mean is that coming out?”
”Molly, I was only there a short time.” I flashback to my grateful reunion with Tina, and how we sped away from Phyllis’ fireworks for some long awaited ones of our own.
Molly jars me back to the present. ”Well, obfuscate all you want, Bette. I’m certain you’ve seen plenty of women come out.”
I sigh feeling cornered. ”It’s painful mostly. But unavoidable if you don’t want to go insane.”
”Full disclosure for this line of questioning – I’m rethinking my mother’s coming out. That’s all. We left it … actually, I left things very raw between us.”
”I’m sure Phyllis will welcome a calmer discussion about it.”
”Hopefully, there will be no more yelling.” Molly raps her knuckles against the window and gazes outside. ”Mother has a high flashpoint.”
”That I’ve noticed, too.” We smile in agreement. The mood in the car lifts.
Then, out of the blue Molly says, ”Bette, I’m interested in Shane. Tell me about her.”
”What?! Oh, God, you can’t be serious! Your boyfriend’s in law school, like you are, too. Right?”
”A boring boyfriend who’s going into corporate law with his father in Maryland. They just bought a massive golf course. Think about that for a second.”
”I am.” We ride along for a few more minutes. Molly shifts in her seat. I prepare myself for more probing.
”Shane’s a friend of yours, an old friend, right?”
I pull over in front of Angelica’s daycare, ”Molly, let me think of how to say this as clearly as I can, because I’ve already read between the lines of what you are insinuating.”
The car jolts as I throw it into park. ”Do not pursue this. It’s a very bad idea. Shane is categorically not a beginner’s Starter Kit.”
I open the door to fetch Angelica out of her car seat. ”In fact, for a nice girl like you, she’d be a catastrophe.” And then with horror I watch as a sly smile creeps across Molly’s face.
___________
Stay tuned for the next chapter of Touch Tones.
Apologies for the gap that lingered much too far past the holidays. I hope you enjoyed the story, and that you’ll drop a comment if you did.
Blackbird
You can find our story link updates on Twitter when you follow @Blackbird_Write.
@ModernLWord has a hilarious Twitter feed.
@thelword_FPAGE & @foreverthelword each have great pics, links and amusing thoughts.
Thanks to Jacky at LesFan.com who hosts us there. @LesFan on Twitter.
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Thank you so much for updating. I love this story and all the quirky twists and turns.
Thanks so much for reading and dropping your comment. I’m back after a prolonged holiday away. Next story up soon! Please enjoy!
Blackbird
So many great lines…mixing up anxiety and depression pills…the Winnebago…the hoedown. ..can’t wait to read that episode. Alice…so funny. I identified with her most…not so pretty, a little nerdy as she described herself, and a bit needy. But god she had some of the best lines and facial expressions, didn’t she?
And this “not a beginner’s starter kit”…oh jeez that made me snort!!
Wonderful update as I’ve always come to expect from you. I hope your holiday was pleasant and restful. Welcome back!
I love the concept of your story!! Great Read!
I liked the beginners’ starter kit too! But this was epic: “After all, to most everyone Bette Porter is kind of a legion, and they’d love to be her friend, swim in her pool, get drunk on her sex appeal, and laugh at her wit and sophisticated sarcasm.”
Thanx for coming back to us ! And, yes we missed you !
Here’s a comment I got via email –
Lillian wrote: “Comment: Where do I begin…everything about this storyline was appealing.
I can feel for Alice; she is beginning to feel out of the loop. Love how Alice covers her back by
having the plan to use Jenny as her scape goat is need be.
Cute…Tasha’s a #Republican…She’s going to earnestly #FuckMeOver…(good thinking of placing this in)
Funny, but true..Shane is not a beginner’s Starter Kit…Bette would know that for sure.
If someone has a crush on a person…she isn’t going to take advice…law of nature.
The best part for me is: “After all to most everyone Bette Porter is kind of a legion,
& they love to be her friend, swim in her pool, get drunk on her sex appeal, laugh at her
wit & sophisticated sarcasm…who does this remind you of: Jennifer Beals and her
fans adoration…yes, I am in that fan club…
Anxiously awaiting for the continuation….”
” she’s like a masterful or very lucky sailor who’s managed to swing her bow back around, and once again, skillfully catch her sails with the wind.”…….love it …..as well as the other”epic lines” Ben Mac referenced…must be quite a drag for Bette &Tina to live in the fish bowl that is West Hollywood …..can’t wait for Alice to meet Bette’s mom…oh what “wit and sophisticated sarcasm “there will be…thanks BB!
So many bits of snappy dialogue and insight in this installment SHOULD be “lingering” in my mind, and yet the one that is? “Lingering like a far in an elevator.” What am I, twelve?
Sigh. “Lingering like a FART in an elevator,” not “far.”
I have missed your great wit and scene descriptions. Welcome back!
I love that you all have pulled little zings of dialogue out -the lines that were memorable to you and that you felt something reading. I do love everyone of the lines you’ve brought up, so far, especially the one about Bette being a masterful or very lucky sailor and somehow catching her sails once again with the wind. I felt the energy of that line when I wrote it.
Another favorite of mine, that still makes me laugh when I read it is, the description of Bette that Alice coalesces when she says that women are holding out hope that Bette may once again lose her mind and her morals and “lie once against amongst the lesbian proletariat.”
That tickled me when Alice brought that up. It was just another in a long list of Bette’s “ooops, and fuck ups” that have had such unintended consequences for her and everyone else.
So! Hey Everybody! Thanks so much for reading and letting me know you are enjoying the tale, and Season 7 as I’m spooling it out for your enjoyment.
Blackbird
You as always maintaining a high standard in this
history as a rich dialogue in describing bette and Tina, and
his legion of fans.
Awaiting new chapter.
10 Stars.
Rich Alice musings you captured perfectly! Your dedication to character development and expression is admirable. Thank you for posting.