“What can I do, Tina?” Bette whispered, her own tears now present.  “Please” she begged, “tell me what I can do.”

“Leave me alone, Bette” Tina said as she looked Bette directly in the eyes.  “I need you to just leave me alone.  You can’t fix this.  I can’t fix this” she said as she looked away, clearly wishing that the words she spoke were untrue.

“I-” was all Bette was able to get out before she completely broke down.

Tina looked down at her, a mixture of pity, anger and sadness present on her face.

“Good bye, Bette” she said as she turned and walked away, never a backwards glance.

Even before Tina walked away, Bette knew in her heart that at least for now, it was over. Over and done with, in only six months. What had taken seven and a half years to build, had taken only six months to destroy. Her heart ached as she watched Tina walk away. She felt rooted to her spot, unable to move a limb. She knew that she would have to get up and leave but was not sure at this point how to make that happen. The coldness that she had seen in Tina’s eyes only confirmed her words. She had never known Tina as someone that could harbor that kind of hatred but knew that the Tina that she was seeing today was very different from the Tina that she had made her life with.

Bette grabbed her drink and collected her belongings and willed herself to stand. Upon doing so, she realized the finality of the situation. She realized that this was it. She had tried, right?  She felt defeated, truly defeated. She did not know what else to do. The emptiness inside only grew and she felt beaten. She knew that that was the case, she had been beaten. Was she angry? Maybe. Was she sad? There were no words to describe the depths of sadness and anguish that she was feeling at this point. To actually be standing at this table, realizing that her relationship with Tina was truly over, that she was moving on without her, without a fight, was devastating.

For the first time in Bette’s life, she knew that she had lost. It was not a feeling that she was either familiar with or knew. It was not something that she knew how to carry. Her stature had never allowed this kind of defeat in her life before. To move on was the only answer.

Looking up, Bette watched Tina as she walked through the door.

“Good bye, Tina” she whispered, knowing she had no choice now.

“Good bye.”

With that, Bette left.

She walked out to her car, put the key in the ignition, and allowed the tears to fall again. The tears were for her life that was no longer going to be. The tears were for the lost opportunity with Tina. The tears were for the lack of children that would be raised by the two of them and the tears were for the ultimate fear that was to become Bette’s reality.

Sad? Yes. Devastated? No question about it. Able to come back from this? God, she certainly hoped so.

With the car running, she put it in drive and headed back to what was no longer to be her home. She had a call to make, an offer to accept, and a life to build. She only hoped that she would be able to do so in a manner that was befitting the Bette Porter that she had been. The question at this point was, who was this Bette Porter going to become?