She got up and went to the bedroom, Tina was on the edge of the bed looking through a phone book, trying to find a good restaurant to order from. Bette stood in the doorway looking at her, until Tina looked up. Their eyes met and immediately Bette saw her avert her eyes and change their look. Tina looked strained, tired..Then the next second she looked better. Bette knew Tina was trying to keep up a good image for her, but it made Bette feel terrible, made her want to crawl on her knees and beg. Instead she sat on the bed beside Tina and said..”I think you should know, that I tried to off myself because of what you said earlier that day…about me being a skeleton walking around..at the time it hurt because I was trying so hard to be better, and now, right now I see what a big waste that was, me doing something like that. I want you to know it isn’t you..It’s what happened and im just learning how to cope”  Tina stared at her. At first Bette thought she was going to throw down the book, and Bette felt a tightening in her stomach…she felt like she said too much and put herself out there, which was her biggest fear…seeming weak and needing help. But after two seconds Tina’s face scrunched up and she started to cry really hard, the book slid to the floor and her shoulders slumped down…she was shaking her head. Bette put her arm on her shoulder not knowing what to do…”Sorry T”. Tina looked at her and shook her head again..”No Bette I’m sorry, im so so so sorry (Tina moved closer and wrapped her arms around Bette, Squeezing hard…Bette hugged her back feeling light-headed) I’m so sorry Bette, I’ve been trying to get you better by being tough I guess and….I’m sorry “. After a few minutes Tina wiped her eyes..bent her head and kissed Bette’s hand, then stroked the little scar Bette had on her neck from that horrible day. Nothing more was needed to be said, Bette wasn’t better. But a huge load was taken off, and it seemed like the day would turn out alright.

TBC