“What?” Alice says looking over at her.

Carmen looks at Alice and starts to laugh. “You are sooooo red!”

“Shut up!” Alice retorts. “The blood’s making it’s way into your cheeks too.” Carmen giggles and looks back at the television. “What happened?”

“I asked about Kelli.”

“…And?”

“And Shane told me how close they were,” Carmen continues. “It was one thing to think they dated. It’s completely different knowing she’s the only girl that’s made it passed all the walls Shane’s put up. Before she was just some girl that Shane had been with – but now… now she’s the girl that stole her heart. How am I supposed to live up to that?”

“What Shane and Kelli had… it was like a friendship with flaws. I think they confused they’re feelings of love for a friend for feelings of affection. I mean – even when they hooked up there was no real relationship. They did everything together, but they were just friends who hooked up every so often. They would even sleep with other people and they wouldn’t deny it because neither of them cared.”

“That’s the thing though. They were so alike, so perfect.”

“Their friendship was perfect, I’ll give them that,” Alice agrees. “But anything beyond that was just fucked up.”

“Shane said Kelli said she loved her.”

“I know,” Alice says attempting to nod, but finding it hard to do upside down. “I don’t think either of them knew the meaning of love, though.”

“I just don’t understand why she couldn’t just tell me…”

“It’s probably hard for her,” Alice answers. “I hate to break it to you, but I’m pretty sure Shane sees love as a sign of weakness. ‘Feelings’ aren’t really her specialty. When it comes to love, all Shane knows is invisible parents, a dark childhood and faceless girls.”

“Why couldn’t she just trust me though?”

“Shane doesn’t trust people at all,” Alice laughs. “I’m actually surprised she’s shared so much with you already.”

“Can I trust her though?” Carmen asks. “I mean, she doesn’t know how to really be in a monogamous relationship?”

“I’m pretty sure that word isn’t in her dictionary…” Alice answers honestly. “But I’ve been wrong before. You can never really tell what’s going through her head.”