“That’s what I’m afraid of…”

J, S, C House

Shane lays silently on her bed, her hands tucked comfortably behind her head. She’s memorizing the cracks on her ceiling. She hears the front door open and her heart catches in her throat. She stays still holding her breath as she listens to footsteps make their way to the room across from her. The door to Carmen’s room opens and closes just as quickly, but no footsteps inside. Instead, a step is taken towards her room. The knob twists slowly and Jenny’s head peeks in. “Hey,” she whispers. “I thought you were asleep or something. The house is completely dead.”

“I was just thinking,” Shane explains and closes her eyes.

“Where’s Carmen?”

“I don’t know…”

Jenny walks to her bed and strokes her arm briefly. “What were you thinking about?”

“Do you think that maybe some people are born without the capacity to love or be loved?”

Jenny looks at her with worry. “No. I think that there are people who grow up without being overly loved and don’t understand exactly what love is until they’ve lost it. And I think that sometimes that’s the only way to ever know you were in love. But I know that no matter who the person is or how confused they are or how many mistakes they’ve made… everyone always has the ability to be loved. Even when they don’t think they deserve it.”

Shane looks at her. She holds her gaze for a moment, searching for the truth in her eyes. “What if all you ever end up doing is pushing away the people that love you.”

“That’s impossible,” Jenny responds quickly. “You can’t push away the people that love you because the people that truly love you will never leave.” Shane only nods. Jenny smiles and gently rubs her cheek. “Good night Shane.”

“Night.”

Jenny gets up and heads to the door. She pauses, handle in her grasp, and turns around. “I don’t know what happened between you and Kelli, but whatever it is, you have to decide that if what you had with her is better than what you could have with Carmen. Either way, someone’s going to wind up hurt. Who would you rather see happy?” She leaves without waiting for an answer. Shane runs her hands across her face.