Fan Fiction
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Chapter 16 – Forget or remember
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”Death for me was something remote. And I remember missing her, our life before this event.”
”When did you stop feeling lonely?”
”I can’t say for sure. It just got smaller over time, or I got used to it.”
”When did you feel that your moms more or less recovered?”
”I’m still not sure that they recovered,” Angie nodded and took a few sips of water. ”Certainly, they have become more like their former selves over time, but they have changed. I don’t know how to explain it. They didn’t become bad, just something in both of them changed. It’s like they used to be freer, more relaxed… I’m sorry, I can’t find the right word,” Angie paused, but Ingrid could see that the girl was thinking about what to say next, so she didn’t say anything either, allowing Angie to continue.
”What is the name of this state, when a person to erase something from their past, as if it never happened?”
”Can you explain more?”
Angie took a deep breath and looked off to the side, thinking about the wording so that Ingrid would understand it correctly. ”They both like to remember some moments from the past, my childhood, our trips, holidays, you know, we sometimes chat about it, watch photos and videos. When they talk about it, they never mention Oli, never. It’s like she didn’t exist in our lives, or like it’s some bad memory, like they crossed her out… God, my words sound awfully rude. I don’t want to say they are cruel or insensitive, but it scares me. They seem to have erased their memory, it looks like this. We have a large album of her photos, printed photos, although all our photos have been stored on the computer’s hard drive for a long time, and it was strange when they made this album, but the point is that no one ever looks in it. I don’t know if they do it in private, but I’ve never seen anyone open it. The only day when we can safely talk about her, bethink about her – is June 29, her birthday. I think there’s a logical explanation for all this, but I just … .. I don’t get it. What can you say about it?”
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This is a really sad and tragic story. Bette, Tina and Angie have yet to reconcile their lives to the loss of Oli. They all must have therapy – individually and as a family. It appears that they have never really talked to one another about the loss of Oli and what it meant to them. If Oli is simply to be repressed into the past and not to be spoken about except on her birthday, then it is difficult to move on with their lives together. The fear of bringing up the deep sorrow will always be a burden and will cause a rift in their relationships with each other. It would appear, they have never shared the pain. It will never go away, but it can be diminished by sharing the hurt and the loss with each other.
This is another chapter which just bring me to tears…..
The pain will never go away, but it can become humble. You’re so right about this…
Thank you for reading this.
Hmmm, still think why you need to bring this unexpecting turn about loss another child to them? I agree with some previous comments – there isn’t any indication of that in previous chapter and now it feels strange to me.
And second – why they together? They can’t grieve together, they can’t talk together about that – only with therapist. Even their daughter prefer talking not with them, but with therapist also. So, why they want to be together?
I hope that you will find answers to your questions in the following chapters. I love this couple endlessly and I want everything to be good for them, but I also want to try to delve into their characters through such a tregic theme. I understand that the transition to this topic was too abrupt and groundless, but this was my idea, which I will try to develop further.