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    Chapter 21 – SUVs and Therapy

    Bette: You’ve never talked much about those things. Do they bother you?

    Tina: I very rarely even think about those days. Sometimes something will come up with Angie and it will remind me of an event in my own childhood which may or may not be related to Angie. But I usually just dismiss that thought and go on. And when telling them today, I wonder if I have resolved some of that disappointment and truly put it behind me. Is it possible that some of my life with my parents is causing me to make decisions the way I do?

    Bette: We are all affected by our childhood experiences in some way or another. We formulate our belief systems, our decision-making process, our goals and ambitions, our likes and dislikes due in some part to our childhood experiences. I suspect that you are not an exception to this rule. So, the answer would be yes… you have been affected. To what extent and in what direction those influences takes in your life is hopefully what therapy will tell you.

    Tina: Well, of course you are right. Everyone is influenced by their childhood… what a silly question. Oh, Judith is going to make another appointment for me for next week, but she is going to let me know.  She is going to try hypnosis on me to see if we can get a few answers fairly quickly.

    Bette: Hypnosis? Oh my god Tina? Are you okay with that?

    Tina:  Yeah. Judith says that I will remember every question and every response. They will make sure that I am relaxed and refreshed when the session is complete. We do not know if I can be hypnotized yet. But Judith will be present during the entire process. Another doctor is going to actually do the hypnosis. I think they are going to schedule a two-hour session. If this speeds things along and I come out relaxed and remembering everything, then I see no reason not to try this.

    Bette:  Do you like Judith?  Do you trust her?

    Tina:  Yes, I do. I don’t think she would recommend something which she did not think would be beneficial to me in the end. Yes, I trust her

    Bette:  Well, if you are good with it, then I am good as well. Is there anything I can do to help you with this?

    Tina: Well, as soon as we get the kitchen cleaned up and say good night to Angie. If we could retire to our room and if you would just hold me for a little while. I’ve missed being with you today. I just want to be close to you and sleep.

    Bette:  That, I can do. It would be my pleasure.

    Tina:  Nice dinner Sweetie. Thank you for doing this for us. If it had been up to me tonight, we would have probably had to have take-out.

    Bette: Well, the roast beef is in the fridge, and we will be getting at those boxes of yours tomorrow. So, we will prepare dinner together tomorrow evening. You know, you are not totally responsible for meal prep. It’s my job as well.

    Tina: I know. And you are really good in the kitchen. I just wish I had gotten you into cooking earlier in our life. We might have avoided a few of our problems.

    Bette: Well, I love cooking, and I may not have your expertise, but I’m into it now. I’m going to start the kitchen.

    Tina:  I’m right with you.

    They both cleared the table and cleaned up the kitchen and took all the clean laundry upstairs. They stopped in on Angie and reminded her not to stay up too late and kissed her good night. Angie was smiling from ear to ear. Her moms seemed so together again. They were relaxed, playful, and seemed happy.  Angie was particularly glad to see her Mama B happy and calm. It felt comforting to know they were doing well. She just hoped that this was something permanent.

    Bette and Tina went through their nighttime routines and got into bed and kiss and cuddled for a while and then went to sleep. Both glad for having the other in their bed. Both still very much in love with other.

    Comments

    1. Hey Martha,

      Great chapter!!!

      It was good to hear about Tina’s past, like Bette said the way you grew up, you take some of that with you, in how you act especially. Hypnose, I’m not against that if it can help you and get you quicker to understand some things about yourself, still talking and getting tools to handle situations is very important, Tina really needs that so that her first instinct is not to just run away but rather think and communicate about it.

      Bette is so supportive and sweet to Tina, i simply love her.

      And Angie is so happy with her SUV, she can handle that responsibility, she will do not crazy things.

    2. By the end of this story, I think you will see that Tina is very much aware of what caused her to run. I think that she will be more aware of how she perceives life and will make a conscious effort to communicate with Bette. The cost of not communicating is high and not one she wants to pay.

      The weekend is coming. And it’s off to Vancouver.

      Thanks for reading and for commenting. You seem to be enjoying this so far… I hope that continues.

    3. Oh dear, Tina didn’t have a very happy childhood did she!

      Thank goodness for her father, he seemed to be there for her in her younger days, far more than her mother. I cant understand her mum, why would you put your career in front of your children. It seems it was just with her, she wasn’t there much for her brother and sister either !

      It’s very sad as well that she has not seen her sibling for such a lot of years. That must be terrible and have som3 sort of effect on you.

      Thank goodness she found her Bette and found their deep love.

      Then ….. eventually loosing her father and thinking he wanted to go and make a new life with a new family…..heartbreaking!

      Poor Tina, considering she had such a loveless childhood she has at least turned out to be a very caring and loving adult, wife and mother. Perhaps this flight tendency she has is a protection technique? She’s been hurt so much by all her family leaving her, she now just ups and leaves a situations before she is hurt!
      Oh dear !

    4. Janice,

      The thing about childhood and your relationship with your family is that generally, it’s the only one we know. Donna is the only mother Tina knows until she gets older and associates with other families and people and can see the difference in relationships. Donna is not an ideal mother. She is very much into appearances than in reality of situations. And this has a huge impact on her children. Her children never really have a bond with their mother and yet they very much have a bond with their father. It’s their father who engages with the children and their lives.

      As to Steven cheating and leaving the family? Well, I do not believe that was what he really wanted. But Steven believed that he owed this new child a father. Since two of the three of his first children were close to or at adulthood, and with Tina being 13 years (almost 14), he decided that his place was with the child yet to be born. Steven’s relationship with Donna did not make it appealing to stay with his original family. So, he chose that which he believed best for everyone and not necessarily what was best for himself. To me Steven was a man trapped by circumstances, some of which were not of his own making. Sometimes, decisions are tough as there is always someone who get hurt.

      There is much more to come on Tina’s backstory.

      Thanks for reading and for commenting.

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