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    Chapter 8

    Story written on October 29, 2022 by Largo.
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    7 votes, average: 4.43 out of 57 votes, average: 4.43 out of 57 votes, average: 4.43 out of 57 votes, average: 4.43 out of 57 votes, average: 4.43 out of 5 (7 votes, average: 4.43 out of 5)
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    Number of Comments: 12
    Words: 7777
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=113876
    Author Notes:

    Tears pricked Tina’s nose. She sniffed. Moved to lean on the balustrade, so that she was side-on to Bette, not hiding but not entirely visible. Her heart thudded. The sense of a doorway opening. But did she have the courage to step through it? Bette was silent. Seemed to have given up on receiving a

    Tears pricked Tina’s nose. She sniffed. Moved to lean on the balustrade, so that she was side-on to Bette, not hiding but not entirely visible. Her heart thudded. The sense of a doorway opening. But did she have the courage to step through it?

    Bette was silent. Seemed to have given up on receiving a response. And then Tina spoke.

    ‘That night in Yale,’ she said quietly. ‘I know you were shocked when I brought up the infidelity. But it lives inside me, Bette. It sleeps in my heart and whispers to me whenever I start to believe I could be happy. That I’m good enough.’

    She looked out at the ocean, at the edgeless black that lay beyond the pool of light thrown onto the sand by the house. Then she turned to Bette.

    ‘I love you, Bette,’ she said, her voice broken with tears. ‘And as much as you hurt me, I hurt you too. I know I did. And I’m so, so sorry . . .’

    ‘I don’t care,’ Bette said, swiping tears away casually.

    ‘Well, I care. I care, because you deserve to be happy. And I don’t know what’s in the future. I mean, there could be a baby, and I don’t really love my job any more, but—’

    ‘So change it!’ Bette snapped. ‘Fucking change it, Tina. Quit being so passive and go after what you want!’

    Tina gasped, suddenly much more alert. Bette was staring at her with fire in her eyes.

    ‘I . . . I can’t . . .’

    ‘Why not?’

    ‘Because I did that once already!’ Tina blurted. ‘I did that when I left you! I told you I had to go find myself and I’m still fucking miserable! So if I change course again, and go after something else, what did I do that for? Why did I leave? And who’s to say a new career would be any different? The problem isn’t that I don’t believe in myself, Bette, the problem is you.’

    They stared at each other. Bette gaze moved over Tina’s face, as if she was looking at it for the first time. Or the last . . .

    ‘Well,’ Bette said, ‘I don’t think that’s true. I think you have more power than you realise.’ She looked up at the stars for a long, long moment, then back at Tina. Her dark eyes glittered. Her lips gilded with tears. ‘But it takes courage to use it.’

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    Comments

      • Hi Martha! Thanks for reading and commenting. Not suprised you’re confused, lol – I don’t think this is the best chapter I’ve ever written. It’s hampered a little by being from Tina’s POV. She can’t see her problem clearly, so she might be wrong when she says the problem is Bette. But this is also just a complicated situation and I might have not done a very good job of it.

        Oh well. I hope it was entertaining in places!
        Thanks
        L

    2. I am going to go back and start at the beginning and binge read this. I too, Martha, feel like I’ve missed some of the story along the way. I like the story but I am unsure of what Tina and Bette are in their relationship??? Hopefully my read over will help. Gosh, poor Angie!

      • Hi Finn422! *waves* Thanks so much for reading this and for commenting. Your time and feedback is much appreciated. :-)

        Like I said to Martha, I think this is a complicated situation but I’ve maybe made it worse by not writing very well. I’m sorry. I hope you maybe enjoyed some of the lighter sections of this story anyway?

        Thanks again
        L

        PS – don’t worry about Angie, she’ll be fine, lol

    3. Tina saying that Bette was the “problem” didnt immediately give me a WTF rise, bc I think she’s gonna expound on that more.

      The comment about how “I felt flattered when Brian asked me. I mean, me…He asked me!” Is what raised my eyebrow. Was she talking about the most recent trip to Chicago to be apart of the new project? Or asked her to be his wife??

      Last we knew, Bette had CERTAINLY become the type of spouse that “flattered” Tina. She was heads over heals in-love with Tina!!! How on earth could ANYBODY else outshine Bette’s affections??

      And Angie??? As soon as she said that she did NOT want her morning coffee, it popped in my head that she was pregnant. And then when she immediately became nauseated at trying to eat her favorite breakfast, I was sold.

      But we’ll see when they go to the Dr. For confirmation. We’ll see . . . .

      • Hi Dumplin, my friend! *waves* How are you doing? It’s lovely to see you here. Thanks for reading this and for posting a comment! :-)

        I figured people would twig that Angie was pregnant at breakfast, so I tried not to string it out! But yeah, good that you got that.

        The thing with Brian is just business. Tina is just flattered that he – a golf pro – thought that she was the person he wanted to bring on board with his new business. She’s just insecure about what she can bring to that, so she was flattered rather than thinking ‘oh sure, that makes sense, why NOT me??’ There’s nothing romantic there.

        The thing with this story, and that I’m clearly not doing a great of, is that I’m trying to explore what needs to change with these two people so that they can go forward and be secure and happy for the rest of their lives. I also decided, maybe foolishly, to try and do that without showing either of them with a therapist!! Oh well. Maybe the next chapter will clarify things, lol

        Thanks, Dumplin. I appreciate you reading this. Take care
        L

      • Hi Bibi, my friend! *waves* Thanks for reading and commenting. :-)

        I am taking on. board that folks are confused by this, lol. It’s partly confused because Tina is confused and this chapter is from her viewpoint, so she can’t step outside her own confusion and explain herself, if you see what i mean? However, I also think I haven’t written it very well. So I’m sorry about that. I hope the next chapter might be clearer!

        Really appreciate you sticking with it! Hope you’re well! Not long till S3 and Tibette endgame!
        L

    5. Hey pal,

      Wow, I honestly don’t know what to say except that I have to go back & reread the last 3 chapters to get my head around where this story is going.

      Gotta be honest – it’s very confusing as you’ve noted.

      So, before I comment further, let me review one more time.

      Chat soon.

      • Hi Collins! *waves* Thanks so much for sticking with this story and giving me your thoughts. :-)

        I think I really made a mess of this, lol. I wonder if what happened is that, in wanting Tina’s dialogue to be realistic I’ve ended up with her not making herself clear? I didn’t want her to sound like a therapist. But basically she’s just really doubting herself, and her ability to make the right decisions. She loves Bette but she’s aware that she loved her before, and still hurt her – so that’s confusing, right?

        aaarghh….. oh well – I’ll try and make Ch9 better!

        Hope you’re well, my friend?
        L

        • Wave right back at ya!!

          Of course, you’ll always be my friend. But I think you were asking if I’m, ok?? Yes, I am.

          TBH, this story has taken turns that I hadn’t anticipated when you first started to right it. Which is ok, story twists & surprises are always good & keep the reader on their toes & on the edge of our seats at times too.

          But I don’t think you’ve got this settled in your mind yet. ???

          I think your intention was to show Tina’s perceptive & her hesitation to once again become emotionally involved with Bette in a romantic way. She’s doubting herself & if & why Bette could ever love her & maybe even why Bette loved her in the first place. ???

          But if that’s true, it’s not how it’s come across on the page. Tina blaming Bette was like a cold slap in the face!

          Again, let me read thru the last few chapters again. I know you’re on a tight time schedule, so I hope to get back to you asap.

          Stay well yourself. A bit chilly here in TX this week. WooHoo!!!

          • Hello! *waves* Sorry, I somehow didn’t notice you’d replied to my reply. Thank you for that. I think we covered all the bases in our epic emails, lol
            Take care
            L

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