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    Comfort Enough

    “Bette Porter,” she said, answering her private line.


    “So I’m thinking that what I need is an occasion. Something fun to look forward to since Christmas is so far away,”
    Alice said.


    “Dana’s wedding isn’t enough for you?” Bette asked, leaning back in her chair with a smile.


    “Maybe I wasn’t clear. When I said occasion, I was thinking of something celebratory. Or at least something that didn’t make me want to puke,” Alice complained.


    “And you are calling me, because”


    “Because a baby shower would be the perfect occasion.”


    “I see,” Bette said, nodding with comprehension.


    “You provide the baby, I provide the shower. Do you see where this is going?”


    “I actually might need to re-route you from your desired destination,” Bette said. “Tina is leaning away from the shower idea. A party, she would do. But not a shower.”


    “No guess the birth weight, guess the due date, pin the tail on the stork?”


    “Pin the tail on the stork?”


    “I’m improvising here, okay? Work with me. What’s the problem with a shower?”


    “She doesn’t want everybody to spend a lot of money on presents.”


    “No presents?! You’ve got to be kidding me. This baby is as close as the rest of us are probably ever going to get to having a kid. And now you’re trying to deprive us of the joy of spoiling it rotten?”


    “Tina said there’s a teen mothers group that meets at the Center and those girls need baby gifts a lot more than we do. So instead of getting us a bunch of stuff we can afford to buy, she wants people to make a donation to the Center,” Bette explained.


    “Mother Tina of Calcutta,” Alice muttered, shaking her head even as she smiled.


    “So. Party, fine. A ritual or a ceremony? Good. But no presents.”


    “And you’re sure about this? She wasn’t on some Yoohoo bender when she brought it up?”


    “I’m positive. We’ve had several conversations about how we want to welcome this baby.”


    “How did you two go from not discussing anything less than a year ago to hosting summits?”


    “We’re trying harder. And we have more time on our hands. We’re up a lot in the middle of the night.”


    “I’ll bet you are.”

    Page 1 of 212

    Comments

    1. Can’t…stop…laughing……….

      There were so many great one-liners in this one that I can even begin to choose a favorite.

      Sooooo, Alice, Bette and Shane. Bullseye!

    2. I dont know why ppl think Bette is the dominant one Tina seems to always get what she wants her at least her needs seem to be top priority for her framily.

    3. “Oh, don’t be such a pussy,” Alice said, rolling her eyes. “We’ll make a donation to the teenage whatchamacalit people. Great line from Alice….sheeees baaaack!
      I like vam really missed the lighter interaction between framily members in S2…..great update, thanks!

    4. “You provide the baby, I provide the shower. Do you see where this is going?”
      “And you’re sure about this? She wasn’t on some Yoohoo bender when she brought it up?”
      “How did you two go from not discussing anything less than a year ago to hosting summits?”

      Apparently I’m quite a bit easier to get along with when I’m only half awake,” Bette said.
      “I always thought you were much easier to get along with when you were totally asleep, but that’s just me,” Alice said.

      “I know, I know. No presents. Give the money to a leper colony in Encino that needs to buy bandages,”
      But Tina has got to be smoking crack if she thinks we’re not buying this baby any presents. Are they raising the kid as a Jehovah’s Witness?”

      Half of this crap wasn’t even invented when we were babies, and we turned out all right. Well…more or less,” Alice said, looking Shane up and down.

      “And you’re suggesting what? Baby camo fatigues? Or basic black?”

      LMAO….the things that come out of Alice’s’ mouth!! I dedicate this chapter to Alice – she is funny as hell!

    5. “so im thinking that what i need is an occasion. something fun to look forward to since christmas is so far way,” this story is my christmas present. *sigh*

      “danas wedding isnt enough for you?”

      “maybe i wasnt clear. when i said occasion, i was thinking of something celebratory. or at least something that didnt make me want to puke.” priceless

      “no guess the birth weight, guess the due date, pin the tail on the stork”

      “mother tina of calcutta.”

      “she wasnt on some yoohoo bender when she brought it up.”

      “i always thought you were much easier to get along with when you were totally asleep, but that just me.”

      and everything snQQpy said. dont want to duplicate, ahaha. the jokes. the closeness, the love, friendship. god what has IC done to our show. we havent seen any of this since s1. thanks again.

    6. Baby, baby
      Where did our show go?
      And all of its promises
      of fun forever more?

      I’ve got this burning, yearning, yearning
      feeling inside me
      For a storyline
      about Bette and T

      They came into our lives
      they were the perfect kind
      But in the next season
      They seemed to leave love behind

      Now that we’ve surrendered
      For season three
      We’re at the mercy
      of the mind of IC

      Ooh, Baby, baby
      Where did our show go?
      Don’t they want it?
      Don’t they love it no more?

      Fanfic, Greentea, please don’t leave me
      Ooh, please don’t leave me
      All by myself

    7. Hey techgal so true where did our show go. IC put us through so much drama last season even Alice could barely get us to laugh and thats almost impossible. Now back to this update. You gotta love Alice and Shane. The sane and insane too funny, Shane at Baby’s r us. STill lovin this story, god I wish IC would read some of this stuff and see how we all really feel.

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