"Dana—nooooo!" Lara convulsed and sat up in bed covered with a sheen of sweat. With a shaking hand she reached over and turned on the light. Swinging her legs from beneath the covers, she rubbed her face and sighed. When would these fucking dreams ever stop, she wondered? It had been six months since Dana’s death had left Lara reeling, and the dreams were more horrifying now than they had been at the start. Each one seemed to find a new and more disturbing way for Dana to be pulled into darkness leaving Lara within inches of being able to save her. Within inches but never able to touch her. Lara groaned as tears of frustration began to roll down her cheeks.

"I think I’m going fucking crazy." She muttered and glared at the clock. 4:23. "At least I got four hours tonight."

Knowing there would be no more sleep, Lara began to wander around her apartment, idly picking up dishes and books as her thoughts once again slid over the events that led up to her ill-timed trip to Paris six months previously.

The anger that had emanated from Dana was so intense during the initial phase of her diagnosis, and it all seemed aimed directly at Lara. Once the treatments began, and the reality of cancer began to sink in, Dana’s hostility turned to sullen silence and cruel indifference until finally Lara had been pushed beyond the breaking point. In a fit of self-righteous anger she’d blurted, "Would it be easier if I weren’t here?" Dana regarded her with a cold look before answering, "Yes. I just want you to go. Leave. Go to Paris."

Lara had stumbled from the room, blinded by tears and wracked with misery. Two days later she boarded a flight to Paris. The last thing she did before she turned off her cell phone was dial Dana’s number. As the answering machine picked up and Dana’s strong, confident voice began to explain she was not available at the moment, Lara squeezed her eyes shut and silently cursed the tears that threatened to fall once again. "Dana? It’s me. I’m going. I love you." She disconnected, wiped her cheeks, and powered off the phone. It had been the worst moment of her life.