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    Do What You Have to Do, post 3

    Story written on March 4, 2007 by kelika.
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    16 votes, average: 4.50 out of 516 votes, average: 4.50 out of 516 votes, average: 4.50 out of 516 votes, average: 4.50 out of 516 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5 (16 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)
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    Number of Comments: 14
    Words: 3039
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=64822
    Author Notes:

    deep within I’m shaken by the violence of existing, for only you

                While Tina appreciated that no one knew the depth of feelings that she continued to have for Bette she began to wonder if anyone really knew her.  Henry or her feelings for men had turned into a stroke of brilliance.  It backed Bette and the whole crowd off quicker than anything else she could imagine.  It surprised and hurt her just a little that those closest to her accepted her change of direction so easily. 

     

                Bette she understood in that her vision was clouded as hers had been with hurt and betrayal.  She never should have told Bette that she wanted them to be a family again.  There was so much going on at the time, they had made love and it undid her.  It made her forget why she had run to begin with.  Then there was Melvin’s death and Bette’s grief, and then there was the difficult birth and finally Bette being fired and unemployed. 

     

                The doubts came quickly.  She wondered if Bette really still wanted her.  She could live with just about anything but Bette being with her out of obligation was not one of them.  When she reviewed the day in her mind when she told Bette that she wanted to have a home birth, Bette had assumed she meant her home.  Bette did not understand that there was only one home for her and that was wherever Bette was.  That was the first warning signal. 

     

                Later as she thought about Bette’s reaction to her wanting to come home she became more convinced that Bette didn’t want to reconcile.  Even though she seemed pleased prior to that declaration when Tina said she wanted to date her joy was not present when she agreed to Tina coming home.  She smiled but the way she sat dumbstruck on the couch afterwards haunted Tina.  Was this only for Angelica? 

     

                They had never spoken of Candace.  Tina worried that she was no longer enough to hold Bette nor did she want to if that was the case.  She was not prepared for her post pregnancy body and how unattractive she felt.  While her pregnant body surprised her in how her sexual confidence exploded her post-natal body left her feeling wholly undesirable.  As much as she wanted Bette sexually she could not make love with her with any measure of confidence so she did not make love with her at all. 

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    Comments

    1. Wow, very powerful. I have always thought that there was more to Tina’s thinking than what we have been given. Both have hurt each other so much, but now they know that they can not live without the other. Is it too late? I sure hope not!

    5. WOW!! So powerful!!!! I thought there was more to Tina’s thinking. I know people are going to hate me for this, but Jodi and Bette are great together. It is nice to see Bette smile and laugh she just looks very happy most of the time when Josi is around. I think her and Tina will get together again. Thanks PPS

    6. Great idea and thought development. Man, IC and her writers REALLY NEEDS to come to fanfic land to get some pointers on writing and story development. I love how Tina has gotten to a point or distance where she can see the Candace deal for what it was. That doesn’t make what Bette did right, but let her know that it was not all consuming. I believe that it is NEVER too late and Tina should fight for Bette. It’s time for her to be the persuader :o)

    9. It’s a shame that they’re so distant that Tina thinks any kind of emotional revelation to Bette would mean her making a fool out herself, but there it is; that’s the state of their relationship. It’s just a shame. Maybe one day Tina’ll go it bareback again. I can hope, anyway. Thanks for the chapter, kelika.

    12. Well if she gets to ride bareback again hopefully it isn’t just one more time, but rather for their lifetime. Too much between them to just have a final ride.

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