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First Year- Chapter 20
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She put my out of my private misery and pulled on the scrubs, “Maybe we can go running or biking together sometime.”
“Bette, I can guarantee you I am not anywhere near triathelte level. I doubt if I would make a good training partner.
“Trust me. I’m just starting in that triathelete training thing, so you wouldn’t have to worry about keeping up. Since I’m borrowing your shoes, maybe that might encourage you to work-out with me.”
“If we can find an off day together then we have a date.”
She smiled at me and nodded. I thought, Fuck why did I use the word ‘date’, I should have said, ‘plan’ or ‘idea’ instead. My anxiety was getting the best of me. I was beginning to second guess the intention of everything I said.
Fortunately for me, my neutralizer, Jenny came strolling into the locker room to break my increasing anxiety. She said in near panic, “Sorry to interrupt but the triage nurse said a patient is heading in, in full arrest, she wants one of you in the trauma room, ready to help with the code.”
Bette hurriedly put on my running shoes to head back out and vowed, “I’ll return these tomorrow and get you a new one to spare.”
“Don’t worry. I’m in no rush. I’ll get them back when I get them back.”
Once she left I reflected on the image of her in her underwear. My imagination began to run away from me, much further than I wanted it to. I needed to put everything in perspective, 1, she’s straight; 2, she’s serious about her boyfriend; 3, we are colleagues; 4, I was just coming off my disappointment with Dylan and therefore was very vulnerable. I had to admit to myself, given my distant past 1 and 2 may not be my biggest obstacles. Bette had never shown even the slightest inclination of any interest in women. But as they say, you are straight until you’re not. But who was I kidding. I was so wounded over Dylan I was not seriously, remotely interested in anyone. Not Carmen, not the new Renoir, not Bette, not anyone else.
I knew I needed to shake my blues. My birthday was 5 weeks away. The big elaborate party I was planning seemed empty without Dylan. I decided to have a more intimate, smaller dinner party with my closest friends. I just was not in the mood for the live band, party all night event, I was initially planning. I was able to cancel the country club reservation for their big ballroom. I found on of LA’s hottest restaurants and put a reservation on their private room for 10-15 of my closest friends. Even with that, I was just not looking forward it. Why? Dylan was out of my life. Dana was sick. It didn’t exactly feel like there was much to celebrate. Quietly, I thought I might just spend it alone, with a bottle of wine and a good book.
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Hello My Most Passionate Friend… hehe… I’m not sure its going to be a 60 chapter story either… I’m thinking more along the lines of an 80 + chapter story… with many sequels to follow… Second Year… Third Year… Forth Year… Sixth Year… I’ll be here for the whole ride… Love and Hugs, Always and Forever, JC
You know the first time I read that Helena would have her heart broken twice. I just assumed it would be from a romance but now I’m thinking it can be from any type of situation. I hope Bette isn’t the cause for Helena’s second brake and tell Helena’s secret. Sometimes people divulge information without meaning harm. Bette could tell her boyfriend which could eventually get back to the clinic. Helena needs to take a page from Bette and keep a low profile. She can still associate with people and try to have fun but one of the best advice I’ve gotten was if you don’t want something repeated keep it to yourself. It’s time for Helena to step-up and take control of her life. It’s nice to have friend to lean on when you have problems but it’s also nice to figure it out on your own. Don’t mind my rants regarding Helena. She can be dense at times but if I wasn’t enjoying the story I wouldn’t keep coming back….right. :-)
Oh dear Helena is going to have to move into the heartbreak hotel if she’s not careful. I have a sure fire way to steel my heart but cannot share it here becasue the white coats would be coming for me. You know however many chapters you write I’ll follow. Thank you, Md, still missing Raques Oma
Hello… Yep its me again… I think part of the notion of heartbreak is a really deep one and can be analyzed from many vantage points… for heartbreak to really set in one must have an emotional connection with someone… and at this juncture I don’t feel she has that with Bette… if Bette broke her confidence it would more likely be a betrayal seen in Helena’s eyes as someone trying to use her to elevate herself up the proverbial ladder… maybe when and if they develop a relationship beyond the guarded natures that is being a resident… and I’m only going by what I have read and those people I have interviewed in the past with regards to this… but for me I’m thinking the second ‘heartbreak’ that Helena might suffer is one that all Doctors, residents, nurses and the likes suffer at one point or another… a bonding connection to a very special patient… one thing that they need to learn and most learn the hard way is the emotional separation that is necessary to survive… so I am thinking that this is where the second heartbreak comes into play… maybe its Dana… maybe its someone else that captures Helena’s soul… or maybe it is a traditional heartbreak from someone she falls in love with… cause we realize and understand that Helena is a woman that can fall in love very easily… and often… hmmmm… I’ve got to go back and check my notes *wink* *wink* love and hugs, JC
Wait a minute…wait a minute… I thought the break up with Carmen was a mini-heartbreak… and then Dylan of course. That makes two by my count. I believe that means that I will get my wish and Bette will come around and save Helena from her misery. (See I’m keeping the hope alive, Squirl). Thanks for this wonderful chapter! So many delicious Belena moments I was dancing a happy jig. Oh, methinks the spaghetti is beginning to look a little cooked. Helena needs to see a therapist… really and truly. She’s a mess with a capital M. She wouldn’t be breaking down and making herself vulnerable if she had someone to talk with — maybe a visit to Dan is in order? I hope she stays strong against Peggy’s efforts to make contact. While Peggy’s efforts may have been well intended, they definitely caused her daughter A LOT of pain. As always looking forward to more…
Two great chapters! I don’t know where to focus my comment. Hmmm well, there were so many great emotional moments…just the way we like it! Btw, I see you worked in the armgasm! lol! As always, thanks so much for sharing. PPS
I am so caught up in your story! I am selfish and can’t wait for the next chapter.
When Helena said that she had been let down lately. I could understand why. First it was Dylan not being strong enough to believe in them. Second her mother not taking her relationship seriously. And third in herself for not being able to resist temptation of the flesh. I could see that would be alot to deal with, plus one of her friends maybe dying. Yes that would be alot to swallow. As for Bette I think she saw what Helena may have seen. That’s why she became uncomfortable. What’s that saying “The eye is the window to the soul” or something like that. So can we say soulmate? Great update by the way.
Okay, I detected a little awareness in H that she may have contributed somewhat to her problems with D…that’s good…but like the show H has to realize that she alone is good enough, and while she may have a big libido, when it comes to love – baby, either it is or it ain’t…kinda like that so g if it don’t fit, don’t force it just relax and let it go…with B she doesn’t really know if there is interest so there is a good opportunity for them to become friends and get to k ow one another…though I suspect the locker room moment opened something in B which is why she backed away…I hope asks her out for that “run”. Anyway, like the pace of the story and I think I am up for 80 chapters!!! Cheers.
Haha! You got snow, we got horizontal flakes that didn’t add up! If it’s any consolation, we’re expecting -10 windchills tonight and I’ve got a headcold. Helena needs to get a grip. On herself. On her millions. And come to terms with her mother. Hmmm…I wonder if Bette’s sudden discomfort and subsequent distance come from something within herself she wasn’t ready for? At least she learned something about dressing for the occasion.
Your writing abilities and the ease at which your story enfolds is amazing. Never boring always intriguing. Now Bette may have found that she has an attraction to Helena. Whether one is gay or straight, it is obvious Helena is a stunning woman.
I didn’t assume Bette felt something for Helena. Knowing Helena is a lesbian maybe Bette thought that Helena was falling for her and it made her uncomfortable. Bette knew she couldn’t give Helena what she wanted so she distanced herself from the situation.