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    Fit for Battle

    Next, I’d hear her long sigh as she rolled away to leave me alone while she stared up at the ceiling. I had tried once after escaping a long and detailed orgasm deconstruction to slip back under arm and lie against her after she’d gratefully fallen silent after my outburst. But for the love of God she just started all over again! So obsessed! It was ridiculous! An infuriating dead-end for me with a pillow over my head – my body throbby and still wanting her arms around me.

    And now in my first movie in a long time I’ve got Nikki Stevens who’ll forever remind me of Lucy’s death and now Bette knows almost everything.

    I wonder if I know all her secrets? Oh God, I don’t want to hear anything else, swallow anything I can’t take. It’s as if this next time with her if we ever do try again feels mined with dynamite and front loaded with angst and what’s beneath it all – the dark potential has dawned on her, too. I see it in her eyes all the time now: The fear that if we fail each other again how would we ever continue as a family?

    I’ve been there. I know how it feels when we hate each other. One of us would have to move and far, far away and that would be a disaster for Angelica. A snow globe image suddenly pops in my head of us frozen in time. My mind shakes it and a blizzard swirls around us. For just a few minutes more I want to remember the snowfall at Big Bear, the snaps and fizz of the fire and her body all over me.

    Joyce’s Office – Bette

    ”Are those little red T Rex dinosaurs on your tie, Joyce? That’s a little aggressive even for you, don’t you think?” I ask as I sit across from her polished wooden desk.

    ”T Rex? No, I don’t think so. Kangaroos, little tiny kangaroos I think Phyllis said. She just gave it to me earlier before she flew off to Chicago.” Joyce flips the yellow gold tie back down to her chest. ”And she knows about the hot oil wrestling pictures, Bette.” Joyce shakes her head, sad for me.

    Comments

    1. Tension heating up! Lots of memories swirling for Tina. I hope she can get her head around her feelings for Bette. Is Bette thinking similarly of Tina when not swarmed with gossip? Maybe her weekend in Big. Bear will help shed some light for her that Tina is the only person for her. Love the writing! Thank you!

    2. I really love your stories and the way you write. and I must say it was a good chapter.
      I need an oil picture of Bette ;)
      Tina totally confused in her feelings toward Bette. and this is what I hated the show as well. because postpartum depression could not be explained with this.
      There were times when I just yelled in myself that, “they have a decision, they want each other or not” :)
      If Tina wants Bette back, she should be honest with herself and to Bette.
      maybe afraid from the love, but I think, to live in limbo much worse :)
      I’m looking forward to the next chapter!

    3. This chapter was outlandishly wonderful. Jane Lynch was perfect in the role of Joyce Wishnia. Bette never wanted to go to Big Bear w/Jodie. She probably realized that Jodie was not a good fit w/her. She so badly wanted to succeed in one personal relationship that she tried to give up her core values to mold herself to Jodie. Didn’t work and really never had a chance. Tina’s the one, the only one for Bette. Bette was outrageously great as she blew her cool while speaking to Tina and James. Terrific chapter.

    4. hi blackbird.. finally catching up on my reading… love this… i always get a laughter when Bette loose her temper haha… tina … i gotta credit her to keep her sanity cuz it not easy with her life day by day with her job, dealing with bette, the people around her( i would go nuts!!!) , and her daughter.. brilliant detailed of this story.. am gonna read the next one to catch up… great work my friend!!!

    5. Joyce is fucking hilarious, so sarcastic and dont give a shit about anything. And yes I would be one of the women on that voicemail lol!

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