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Healing Tears – Chapter 15
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“We used to have that kind of intimacy and bond in our early relationship. How the hell did we get here? Why couldn’t we recover what we had after I lost the baby?” Tina asked trying to make sense of it.
Paul had heard similar questions in his career. If not the loss of a child, it was infidelity, or illness, or unemployment, or financial concerns, or family issues or any number of life-altering events. But what he stressed most was that as tragic as the events might be it’s likely not the sole factor for them not being able to recover.
“You know Tina however life-changing and tragic the loss of your child was for you and Bette it was likely not that single event that caused the death of your marriage. It’s never just one thing that you can pinpoint. If you look hard enough you will note that the demise resulted from a culmination of many insidious little things that went unchecked over the years. That’s what causes the erosion over time so that when the big thing happens you have no foundation to withstand it. The danger in any marriage when you take things for granted is that you stop working on it. The seemingly little things that don’t get any attention build up into much larger issues. If couples don’t deal with them effectively eventually they find that resentment, indifference, and estrangement are not far behind.
Couples stop caring about one another. They stop feeling that the other person’s wants and needs matter to them. Indifference develops and they inevitably start spending time apart, they stop talking to each other, and soon they are so distanced that there is no longer any way to reconnect. Sometimes one or both of the partners feel like they are being spurned. Many seek to restore their sense of worth and self-esteem from others or worse it results in barely contained anger that manifests itself in different ways.”
“I think you are right Paul. We have blamed everything on the loss of our baby but there were so many things leading up to it that we ignored.” Bette admitted.
“It might do you both good to write in your journals about those things. You can share them when you’re stronger as a couple again and maybe you’ll find some answers. Conversely you might never figure out where it all went wrong or you might decide it’s not that relevant how you got here provided you can find your way back. With time, communication and privacy you have a good chance of getting back what you’ve lost. Some of the emotional pain that you’ve inflicted on each other will leave you when you decide to let it go. The saying ‘time heals all wounds’ is only true if in time you are ready, willing and able to let go of the pain. Otherwise it can linger in varying degrees and can form emotional scarring that doesn’t go away and it can affect your ability to ever be truly happy.”
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BAT really sweet update. Hope the tibettes are at peace and start the healing toward their relationship with each other.
I think more people could use Paul as their therapist. He does make sense and maybe he use a unconventional brand of therapy, but i think it works. Having fun by chasing butterflies and then to realese them as a way to release the sad, painful memories and welcome the positive is a fantastic idea.
Bette and Tina really needed it, now they have to do more work with Paul as guide but i am positive they will make their relationship healthy, strong and loving. They need and deserve to be together, and Angelica offcourse as one happy family.
Thanks for the quite insight full chapter!
I have to admit this isn’t how I thought the story would go. The level of comunication is the highest possible. The emotions displayed are raw. The beauty in all of this is hope is restored and they are at a place where real forgiveness is possible.
Maybe if BETTE had been more aware of the emotional toil TINA was undergoing when she lost the baby and not put all of herself into her work ,a lot of pain could have been avoided.BETTE chose to be unfaithful instead of coming to her wife for comfort,TINA felt like a failure because she was being viewed as one intentional or not.Couples think that having a baby brings them joy,BETTE/TINA found out it can bring hurt of the worst kind.Glad they realized they never grieved for the baby nor for their loss,pain,hurt nor have they come to terms with the infidelity but they have come to the one thing that was truly missing,the baby’s name.Letting go of JASON KENNARD PORTER is the stepping stone they needed to cross not whether TINA could parent a bi-racial child or that her partner was bi-racial it seems to me a moot point now.BETTE didn’t need the validation from her father she needed to show and not ask him that she was just as good as him but she would not abandon her family as quick a he did his.BUT she did feel like she was entitled to behave and do things her way.pps thanks
dunnthat, the next chapter will explore and. perhaps give a bit of insight into several of the points you raise from Paul’s point of view. He is speculating, but I. think he hits the mark with his observations. Thank you for sharing your views.
Loved the update. Very cool collecting the butterfly’s and then releasing them. Thanks
You thrill me with this wonderful chapter, I am
with my watery eyes, Ufa !!
Only love can forgive, love and rebuilds.
Tears heal the body and liberate the soul …
The complete constellation.
Good night.
A very well written, thought provoking chapter. Thanks BAT.