As Dana was battling her inner demons, she felt Alice start to slowly move her face closer so that her lips grazed Dana’s cheek. Dana placed her hands on either side of Alice’s face, and as if by instinct, began to use her thumbs to wipe the tears away. It was at that moment that she felt that familiar shaking in her knees and the knot form in the core of her stomach. It was the same feeling she encountered each and every time Alice stood that near and looked her in the eyes with that intense mix of desire and longing. And just like countless times before, Dana felt herself getting drawn into Alice’s gaze like a piece of metal to a magnet. And there was nothing she could do to deny the fact that she was utterly helpless when it came to being this close to her. All of her fears and inner struggles suddenly vanished, and all she could focus on was the impending contact with Alice’s inviting lips.

And then they kissed. And Dana wasn’t kissing her to say goodbye like she knew she should have been. She found herself completely caught up in the moment, deepening the kiss not because she thought it would be the last, but because of the sheer pleasure it gave her. And try as she could to remind herself that she was there to end the relationship, nothing in that moment mattered to her besides feeling Alice’s mouth covering hers, or the electrifying sensation coursing through her body as Alice’s tongue tangled with her own.

She reveled in the feeling until her brain overtook her heart and she forced herself to recall why she was there in the first place. She had no other choice but to pull back, out of her lover’s embrace, and find the resolve to walk out that door.

“I cant. I can’t, I can’t, I can’t…I can’t,” was Dana’s hollow explanation as she pulled away from Alice, but then leaned back in to rest their foreheads together.

And although Alice wanted to yell at Dana that this wasn’t right and she couldn’t leave her like this, Alice’s emotions had overwhelmed her into speechlessness. There was nothing she could say or do but stare at Dana’s mouth and try to force herself to acknowledge the reality of the situation. Dana was leaving her. This was really happening. All of her fears and doubts and “irrational insecurities” were actually based on reality and quickly playing out before her. So why then did it feel so surreal? She and Dana were supposed to be forever; she thought that this one would be different. Hell, she prayed that it would be. But now her forever was coming to an abrupt, world-crumbling end, and Alice could do nothing but watch it all unfold.