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    Is anything really possible? Chapter 17

    Bette’s recovery had been quick, but not surprising given Bette’s health conscious habits.  Her daily routines easily transferred to the management of her recovery.  Tina sadly watched how Bette’s emotional barriers returned as she gained her physical strength. They were talking and Tina saw this as a small seed of hope burrowed deep in the shattered remains of the love between them. Seeing that Bette no longer needed the physical assistance, Tina decided it was time for her to move to her own home.  Angie was not happy about this decision as she was enjoying living with both her parents.  Angie had said on multiple occasions that she was not happy with their separation and felt that it was crazy to be apart when they obviously loved each other.  The simple perspective of one so young Tina had thought at the time, but Tina knew that when parents stay close the children will be happier and healthier for it, almost an unintentional by product of that closeness.  Tina watched as Bette threw herself into her work to avoid dealing with her emotions and specifically dealing with Tina.  Bette was grateful that Tina came to her side when she needed her, but Bette was bound to her fear. She could not allow herself to open up to love that was buried in her soul. This was all a response to Tina telling her she was getting remarried. Although Tina backed out of the engagement, the damage had already been done. Bette’s heart was broken and her mind was still reeling from all that had happened. Tina felt that moving to her own home may be best for both their emotional well being and give Bette the needed space to sort it all out. She had begun to see Bette’s awakening desire for Tina in her eyes, as Bette’s resolve had begun to diminish. Saying that Bette loved Tina was too simple, their connection was an involuntary, indescribable force, Tina was Bette’s mate and there would never be another for either. How Tina lost sight of this was lost to her.  She was now left with trying to rebuild some semblance of a relationship from the ruins left behind.   Tina felt her continued presences and reassurance would assuage Bette’s many worries. Tina knew to regain Bette’s trust, she would have to show she would not leave again, and that was going to take time. 

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    Comments

    1. SupeSupeSuperK
      Great chapter. I totally get why Bette is so closed off. Tina is going to have to earn every baby step to her opening up and well she should. Love that Bette knows they are watching her while she is doing yoga and she just keeps on keeping on. Hope Tina moving out the house still allows for connecting and that Bette doesn’t feel that as her leaving again. Steady on Tina, steady on. Thanks

    2. Thank you for the chapter, but i don’t understand one thing – “to forgive Tina for the third time”. Why third? First time – it’s for the s3 and the Tina’s men trip, but when was second?

        • Dating Helena – it was what Bette deserved for cheating with carpenter. So absolutely not agree, it’s up to Tina – to forgive Bette or not for 4 month affair with carpenter

          • I agree with Zhenya. Bette continued the affair with the carpenter even though she knew she devastated Tina. Bette also had a quickie with a woman she picked up in a New York bar. I don’t consider Tina’s fling with Helena leaving Bette.

      • Zhenya

        This was a tough number for me. My angle was the computer sex and Henry. Helena was problematic because of the whole grant and Helena’s mommy issues. Bette’s big cheat was Candace for sure, the rest I think were known only to Bette. Again, just my angle. Very debatable issue and I don’t think anyone is wrong. Bottom line is where Bette is sitting is can she forgive.

        K

        • Agree. Also – Can we please let go of the Candace debate once and for all or there is never going to be any hope for Bette and Tina. For the accurate record they were apart when Bette went to New York to meet Helena. Bette was a lonely mess. Tina was not in the picture. Plus Bette paid a very hefty price for the affair with Candace. She lost her friends. She attempted suicide. She almost became an alcoholic. She was humiliated in public by Tina and Helena. She lost her job at her fathers funeral due to Helena. She had to beg for scraps regarding access to Angie. Then after Angie was born Tina had cyber sex and intended to have sex with Josh Becker and left Bette to go off with Henry which really damaged Bette and Tina left her again when they lived in New York. That’s a mouthful of hurt!! And she got engaged to marry another woman. So yes – point of this story and probably GQ is that Bette’s faith and trust and self esteem is completely shattered. Probably coming off of a breakdown. And she still feels unbelievable grief and sadness and guilt over Kit. She lost the election due to her own actions. And she may never be able to forgive Tina for Kit or Carrie. Tina needs to recognize all of that. Yet Tina is still defending her actions in not attendIng Kit’s funeral. Alice and Shane did not buy it. Tina and Bette are probably going to have to fight that one out and Tina may not like what Bette has to say. Tina has some work to do and moving out is probably not a good idea. Ruminating Bette is dangerous. Could be a blow up coming. Enjoying the story.

    3. Heart breaking to read about Kit and Bette’s downfall after she signed the divorce papers.

      Like BK, i really understand why Bette is so closed of. It is up to her if she is willing to give Tina a third chance. The love is still there but after all the heart break she endured when Tina left and her not showing up to Kit’s funeral, i really understand that she is wary to open her heart again to Tina.

      Tina should stay in the house as first step that she is serious about making amends and little steps to reconciliation. She has to earn Bette’s trust and that will take time.

      Like Shane, I’m afraid that the pain and grief that Bette bottoms up will eventually erupt. What will be the reason and what will happen?

      Looking forward to the next chapter!

      • Yes, Stay in the house. I like that. It will ground them both, give Bette a sense of permanence. For Angie too. Not too late to cancel the lease Tina!

    4. I completely understand Bette’s keeping Tina at bay. She has been through a tremendous amount of pain particularly in the last break up. And does Bette even understand why the last breakup occurred? She has spent many months trying to get herself in a position just to live without Tina. And when the final last bastion of hope was dashed with Tina’s announcement of her engagement, she decided to cleanse her life of Tina. And then Tina sees that she really wants Bette back, but Bette is ill. Now that she is recovering, its time to decide whether to risk her heart one more time for the woman she loves. She has no explanations as to what went wrong that pushed Tina on her path. There are no guarantees that the same thing won’t happen again. There are no guarantees that Tina is ready for a life committed to Bette Porter. And at this point, we do not know if Bette is willing to put forth the effort to try to get their life back together.

      The emotional storm which is brewing? I am guessing that the emotional storm is Bette’s deep hurt she experience when when Tina left her, then divorce her and then did not show up at the funeral for Kit. Everyone has expressed Bette’s deep hurt but Bette herself. And until she is able to discuss these things with Tina and literally relive them so Tina can see the results of her decisions, she cannot put it in the past and move forward. Bette has a build up of hurt, anger and disappointment which can only be released by communicating them to Tina. Tina will then need to respond as to what she did, why she did it and accept responsibility for her actions and then ask for forgiveness. It will then be up to Bette whether to accept her apology and decide to forgive her or not. If Bette cannot forgive her, then true reconciliation will never happen. This is the emotional storm brewing inside of Bette which will come out and be an explosive event. It was not fun living through it the first time and it will not be a good time to live through it again – but its is necessary.

      Very good story line. I am not accustomed to the deep brooding Bette, but I certainly understand why she is the way she is. My hopes are that she and Tina go away for a long weekend with a counselor and go through what they need to put the past into the past. Then they will be in a better position to evaluate the situation and the potential future and make some decisions about their relationship.

      I like this story… keep it going. Thanks for this chapter.

      • Martha

        Brooding Bette makes the most sense to me after all that has happened to her that has gone unaddressed. I see Bette’s connection to Tina as being the catalyst for the brooding. If Tina wasn’t around I think Bette would have a better chance of ignoring the emotional impact on her by the decisions of others.

        K

    5. Found it a hard read with Bette so low.

      Cannot understand why Tina did not attend Kit’s Funeral it seems out of character.

      I think it will be a big mistake if Tina moves out. Perhaps though it may be a catalyst?

      Waiting to see where you take us, storyteller.
      Thanks for posting,
      Stay safe
      SG

    6. Hey SuperK,

      Got to feel for Bette.

      I think Billy said it all about the Tibette relationship- lots of pain. They have both paid a high price.

      Tina needs to accept her responsibility for her actions & how they have empacked Bette.

      Am worried about Dani & her attraction to Bette. Not good in any way.

      Thanks so much for the update.

      Keep them coming!!!

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