Fan Fiction
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Just The Girl 2.0 – Chapter Seventeen (Based loosely on HYD: Returns)
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN: Inside My Head Your Memory Remains
Previously..
Tina couldn’t have hurt Bette more if she had stabbed her several times in the chest with a knife. She might be half-serious, but the heiress surely didn’t see it that way. Stripping away her arrogant mask, the brunette allowed her hurt to show. “I meant everything I said when I gave you this necklace.. and I still do.” Bette whispered, her eyes glued to the heart-shaped pendant, the one that never left Tina’s neck for three years until now. She chuckled bittersweetly and hastily wiped away the first sign of tears with the back of her hand. “What do you want me to do with this? When you give someone your heart, you’re not really expecting them to hand it back.” She raised her eyes and looked at Tina, but the blonde quickly averted her gaze. The heartbreak and sadness in her eyes must have been too much to see. “If you don’t want it anymore and I’m not taking it back.. this thing must be pretty meaningless now, right?” She weighed the necklace in her hand and closed her fist tight. “Well then..” In a move that surprised them both, she cocked her arm back and threw the pendant in the air. She watched with a mixture of anger, sadness and despair the necklace’s flight – Tina’s eyes on the other hand, only reflected absolute horror. Bette closed her eyes when it hit the shallow pond and disappeared underneath the waters. “..goodbye heart. You won’t be missed you cruel motherfucker.” She whispered sadly, turning around and ambling away from the bridge.
—————
Tina.
You know its really bad when your vocal chords can’t even let out a flimsy scream when every cell in your body seems to be shouting in pure agony.
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.. my mind did all the yelling as my horrified eyes watched helplessly the necklace taking flight – the silver heart glinting under the pale moonlight like a shooting star before it disappeared under a dark blanket of water; lost to my eyes and my grasp forever. Out of sight.. out of reach. The truth behind those words like a painful slap to the face, thundering across my cheek and gripping at my head, knocking all coherent thoughts out of my mind. A strangled sound left my lips in place of a blood-curling shriek; and let me tell you, nothing is as deafening as a silent scream. It was devastating, frightening, and cripplingly heartbreaking. It rippled through my body, sending shockwaves all over my skin. It was gone; it was really gone.
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chakakadin says
thanks alch!!! i think i’m getting greedy with your awesome storytelling, the more you post the more i want more!!! but i know you need time to do a follow-up to this wonderful update so i’ll try to patiently wait. my emotions are up and down, laughing and crying at the same time while reading this but for sure i was just over the moon with the update. i think good times are coming back with bette and tina playing the master and the maid and i’m sure you’ll have fun writing it so i hope you start soon! thanks again.
banana says
thanks a million for your generosity in sharing this ever surprising, moving, funny, happy sad sweet most excellente story – i should call it a novel :-) – with us! that’s our tina – stubborn and immortal weed. i love how you write her and write both characters with such balance. the next chapters will be so much fun :-) i liked your switchup, writing first person from the characters pov in this installment – it worked great. like chakakadin i’m always greedy for more – thank you for another superb ride, alch
Jackiee1 says
Yay, an update; I had given up hope
Englishmuffin says
wow that was heartbreaking to read,but such a brilliant post, however i loved the last page, really can’t wait for your next post with Tina being Bette’s maid (no pressure). also really loved what you did with writing it in 1st person, it really worked.Cheers for the post PPS
mush1912 says
ahhh alch you’ve made my day!! love this story sooooo much! at last, there’s hope on the horizon and i’m glad it’s tina that’s forced this to happen, it always seems to be our bette that has to make the first move. Can’t wait to see how this is gonna play out though! oh and the “human bush” thing – proper made me chuckle…hell i think i even snorted at that!!
carolyn1m says
DAMN-you’re GOOD!! These epics are getting to be worth the wait,so what if it takes some time to finish!! I LOVED the different POV and so appropriate at this place in the tale!!And thank you for the blissful humor you lavished us with!! It did much to buffer the heartacheand now Tina as her maid?? Can it get any better??Can not wait!!
alejita_57 says
Great update as usual. Liked your writing in 1st person.. Thanks for the image of Tina in a maid’s uniform… really hot. I hope they fix things soon. Thanks for posting PPS
lucybelly says
The master and the maid… my imagination is running wild!! Great chapter and I liked the format. I’m sad that Tina didn’t recover Eternity…I’m hoping you’ll fix that. Such funny moments amid all the turmoil. Loved it, Alchy.
Suejan says
God u r killing me here, How I was impatiently waiting for this update :)) and now I hope we won’t have to wait long for the next post so PLEASE PPPVVVVS
pekegal says
Wowser! You are the “epic-queen-of-fan fiction!” You are a rock star! These long chapters are an emotional roller coaster rides…I cried (“She gave it back”), laughed (Sam & Bette), relieved (Jill’s confession), anger (Kate’s timing turning up at the park), sadness (no return of eternity), and roared with laughter (dreaming of porn…My Tina). You are an incredible writer!!!! Ok…we’ve hung on to the drama…please some lightness and “combative” fun that these 2 capture on paper. Rock on Alchy!!!!
pattifloatn says
Oh, that was good. My heart was hurting most of this post, but in the end some of the pain was relieved.
m_s_gypsy says
Way hilarious but not missing on dramatic moments too. And must say, Bettes new maid is a little rough around the edges. LOL
annieb69 says
i always feel after reading one of your posts, that i just read a really good book and i can’t wait for the sequel!!!
talaula says
I knew Jill had the hots for Bette, don’t what she’ll do but I hope her crush fades, like Sam told her. That scene with Kate and “accidental jogger” was too funny. Maybe we can hook Kate and Jill up? Just a suggestion, well more like a request LOL. Love it Alch.
honda90 says
I savored this over 2 wonderful days, I don’t like waiting for more updates just so you know. I will though, wait that is because that’s all I can do, sit and wait, and wait and sit. Thanks for the update it’s something wonderful to look forward to, and now this twist….hmm delicious to read I’m sure!!
trecelovinit says
So, Tina is the maid! Can’t wait to see how this plays out in the next chapters! PPS
theotlv says
Hey girl. Glad you are back and with a big one. Many emotions during the reading but the last one is anticipation. We need you back soon… :) Thanks for the incredible story. Kisses
ut says
That was awesome, the drunk Bette is funny and crazy and scary too lol. Hope she and Tina will sit down and talk and work thing out but now let see some maid and master here lol. I think jill and kate should hook up and they can stay out of B&T’s life. Please post more, thanks!