It’s a strange setup to most people, I suppose. But for the two of them, it makes perfect sense. Over the years, Shane finally stopped feeling so guilty about not being able to commit to one person sexually. She’s never had a problem committing emotionally, and Jenny’s the same way. Honestly I think Jenny wouldn’t mind Shane being hers and hers only, but she’s never seemed to have a problem with the way Shane is. Everyone else she’s ever tried a relationship with has, so it’s been a blessing for Shane. And while I can never ever imagine even thinking of having that sort of setup, I’m just not that sort of person. I don’t really think Shane is either, at least not the way open relationships work in other people’s minds. It’s sex only, but it’s obvious that she’s completely in love with Jenny for anything else. And Jenny, while she might not love that, loves Shane so much that she doesn’t see sex with her as the be all end all of their relationship.

I shook my head to clear it as Shane stood up to go. “I’ll see ya tomorrow, Dane. Take it easy,” Shane said gently as she hugged me. Then she put her arm around Jenny’s shoulders and walked them both out of the room, leaving me alone in the room with a few slices of pizza and the TV. Neither of those things interested me, though. All I wanted to do was go spend some time with Alice.

I went in a few minutes later. It still weirded me out to see her laying so still, but there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it. I pulled the chair up to her bed and took her hand in mine.

I hadn’t planned anything to say. I know that probably sounds dumb, but I felt really stupid for it. For some reason I had it in my head that all my time with her was sacred and needed to be filled with me talking about something worthwhile.

“I guess I could keep remembering stuff, baby, but I don’t know if you can hear me and I want to share it with you,” I told her, running my thumb over her palm. I watched her face for any sign of a response, but of course I didn’t get one. That just made everything worse, which was stupid since I knew there wouldn’t be one to begin with. Still, with the events of the past few days, my emotions were as frayed as my nerves, and I couldn’t hold it together anymore.