She remembered the way he looked in a tuxedo, his frame was built to hold a suit exceptionally well, it made her proud whenever they walked into a room together. Immediately she knew all eyes were on him and she felt so unbelievably lucky to have someone like him on her arms. He’d make funny faces or gestures across the room whenever he noticed that she was bored or less than pleased with the conversing circle she found herself in. Others wouldn’t see it, to them she was engaged and providing another ear to their useless rant , but he could tell by the way she held her glass or the way she would constantly place her hair behind her ear with a steel lock on her jaw, using every bit of nerve not to scream at someone.

Now sitting here looking at him there’s no faces or random shouting at the grocery store to embarrass her and make her laugh, no , this immobile shell was to be burned tomorrow and his ashes flown back home to Montana with his parents. She could never squeeze his face or wipe the shaving cream from his earlobe in the morning or feel his utter gratitude for her fixing his favorite meal. All these things she’d become accustomed to, were to be removed from her everyday life immediately.

They’d made love that morning, slow and steady he took her back and forth almost worshipping her body for this gift. She’d taken him so deeply that she’d stayed in bed all day basking in the feel and smell of him all over her body and bed. Then somewhere between blissful sleep and soft consciousness, her phone rang violently shaking the nightstand. It was Alice, his cousin and business partner. She’d told Tina that Rick had passed out at work and that he’d told her to specifically tell Tina not to worry and that he’d be fine.

Alice reassured her over and over again that it was probably nothing and that he’d be home for dinner as usual. Well now she couldn’t keep herself from worrying. Of course he would be fine, he’s a healthy, fit and very active young man, there couldn’t possibly be anything wrong with him. Maybe he got dizzy from not eating or maybe he had some thing to drink with his lunch. Tina’s mind kept running scenario after scenario through her mind each one more valid than the next. So she got up and prepared herself for the grocery store, determined to make him some feel good food. Once inside she went about the mundane task of picking out healthy vegetables that he liked and food s that he loved. Her phone rang again in the grocery store vibrating her from her thoughts of food. The initial sound made her jump she was concentrating so hard on not trying to worry about her husband.