‘Hi, how are you?’ her instant message popped up.

‘Fine’ actually I’d got so many words other than ‘fine’ to describe how I was. ‘u?’

‘Fine’ came her short reply too. It is a wonder how one word could cause me so much disappointment and pain. I should really give up. Then the conversation died.

Days… months… years… I stopped calling her… I’d typed in text messages but never got to send them. I went ‘Away’ when she was online on instant messenger. There were so many things I wanted to talk to her… to share with her my ups and downs… but my ‘push her away’ mind told me she could never be bothered. I ended up having conversations ‘with her’ in my head… in my own land…

I’d gotten used to the loneliness… I never had any relationship with anyone. Nor I could have relationship with anyone. I had crushes all along my life. But all the feelings for my crushes seemed pale compared to the one I have for this certain someone.

I guess it was quite a success, our memories were fading… but I must admit that the heart pulling and aching for her was still quite visible… my feelings for her were not as strong as it was few years back… maybe I don’t love her anymore… well, that was what I thought until…

 “Bette?”

I looked up and gasped at the strange yet most familiar beautiful blonde who I’d missed so much.

“T…” I heard myself whispered… it was more alike unleashing a part of my heart that I’d been shut out for quite some times. Time stood still, just like I first saw her… but this time longer, I was lost in her hazel eyes… no… I was lost in her soul once more.

Other resident walked passed us pulled me out from falling deeper into her soul. My tears started to gather in my eyes… I guess I had really successfully shut out my feelings for her all this while… but seeing her back making my emotions overloading as well… I never knew I missed her so much until she was standing right in front of me… less than 5 feet away… and my heart started to ache… for her… I wanted to pull her into my arms so much… not letting her go anymore… but still… I was scared…. Scared that my true feelings for her would scare her away.