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No Me Ames; #18
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“Are you alright, Mama?” Becky asked, leaning her head on my shoulder and looking up at me.
I looked into her brown eyes which were laced with sadness and nodded, not wanting to make her anymore upset than she already was, “I’ll be alright, darling,” I managed to croak in reply, my voice course.
“Mama,” Becky said, “Don’t be sad. Mummy’s in Heaven now, there’ll be plenty of meatloaf there.”
I smiled despite myself, hugging Becky close to me and kissing her soft curly brown mane; her hair, just one of the little things about her that reminded me so much of Bette.
The tears began to roll down my cheeks again, I guess there were just never going to be enough tears I could cry. I knew this pain would never go away, it resonated from deep inside, echoing in the hollowness which was all that was left of me.
As they lowered her coffin into the ground, the finality of her death struck me. This wasn’t just a bad dream I would wake up from. My heart was literally being torn out of my chest, and buried six feet under.
◊◊◊
“You sure you don’t want me to stay with her?” I heard someone whisper from outside my door, “I really don’t mind.”
“No, dear, it’s fine. I appreciate your offer, but perhaps it might be better for now that I’m here,” Mummy replied.
“But you’ll call me if you need anything, yes?”
“I will.”
“I’ll come by again after work.”
A click of the door.
“Grandmamma?” Becky’s voice said, “Is Mama going to be ok?”
“She will be, baby, she’ll be just fine. She’s just tired and wants to rest. Are you hungry? Let’s go have some dinner shall we?”
The voices faded away into the distance as I buried myself deeper underneath the sheets; they still smelled like Bette, the pillow scented with the faint hint of her shampoo. I clung on tight, unwilling to let the last bits of her fade away, I still wasn’t ready to let her go.
I closed my eyes as the events from only a few nights ago played through my mind like a vintage movie, black and white frames of memories.
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Refresh… LOL… for old times sake… time to go and read… Love and hugs cuzzie… love and hugs… always and forever, JC
Was missing your writing, dear euni…that’s all I can say right now. Hope you understand. Thank you.
OMG Euni, I have tears streaming down my face…this chapter was definitely a three hankie one. Thank goodness Tina was able to help Helena start the process of grieving for Bette. Tasha may be able to really understand Helena’s pain. I hope Helena is able to heal. I can’t wait to see where you take the story from here…
“Mummy not coming home anymore, but I’m here, you still have me here. And I’ll take care of you Mama. This just broke my heart. And then you put the icing on the cake so to speak with “The tears trickled down my cheek as my fingers dug into the dirt. Now I find myself crying like a baby. You’ve did an excellent job kiddo. If your skills in writing this story is any indication of what you may accomplish in life. Then school should be no problem for you. I can see you going to the moon and back!
Time heals a lot of wounds,The fact you lost your soul Mate leaves a hollowness that will always remain empty, The touch,,the smells, they will always remain. Sometimes when the door is open at a certain time. You look up wanting to see the smiling face and its a friend. In your bed its cold and empty,yet you get up every morning and go about your daily life. thank God for children and family and friends. thanks
it still hurts. could not stop crying, my heart is broken. How hard it is to lose who you love and loves you back? It will get better but you will always remember and miss her Helena.
You know E, your gonna have to make me stop crying cause I don’t like to cry, but your chapters are very very good ;)
Amazing chapter. It reminded me a little the movie Practical Magic (I love this movie). It was beatiful! Thanks
well done, the way you capturedbthe emotion was amazing!! I think I am still in shock…but glad that H is getting back in motion…geez…I am still sad…can you write in a long lost twin sister for B to bring her back or will she have a guest appearance like Dana did as a guiding light…anyway, yet again WELL DONE!!!
I know from my own experience how elena feels right now. when you have to burry someone so dear to you, someone whom you loved so much, who was your soulmate it feels as if they burry a part of you as well.
I caught up on this story last night and had to come back in and comment. Great story, hard to read, but impossible to put down. I don’t come to tears very often, but this one did it, pulls at the heartstrings.
Its weird with Bette gone but…I just hope Hels dont die of a broken heart and shes there for many more years with Rebekah. And now she has Tasha to talk to someone to actually relate to, things many get easier through time.