The church was filled with white flowers. Light was pouring through the large stained-glass windows and over the alter, almost as if the presence of a spirit was filling the church. ‘This place is beautiful,’ Carmen said softly, leaning towards Shane. Shane didn’t answer. She didn’t like the feeling she got whenever she was in a church. The smell of old wood and incense tickling her nose made her feel dizzy and reminded her of days in the past, when she used to look for a place to sleep in a church shelter, all tired and fucked-up. So fucked-up. But her girlfriend seemed to feel perfectly fine and walked up to the third row and took a seat. ‘Carmen.. can’t we just sit in the back?,’ Shane protested softly.
‘No.. why? We are early, the church is still empty. There’s enough room here.’
‘Yeah but..’
‘Baby, you’re family. You have every right to sit in the front of church,’ Carmen spoke firmly. Shane sighed but obliged, and sat down next to Carmen. The church slowly filled with people and as the ceremony began a young girl, who was sitting in the front row, turned around and stared at Carmen.
‘Is that Eliza?’ Carmen whispered, nudging Shane with her elbow.
‘I guess so,’ Shane shrugged. The young girl was beautiful. She had dark, curly hair and little freckles on her nose. It seemed as if her big and sad eyes could penetrate right through Carmen’s soul. It made her feel uncomfortable. She tried to make the Eliza pay attention to the preacher, by pointing at him and making funny faces, but the little girl kept staring at her instead, throughout the whole ceremony. Carmen felt Shane’s hand blindly search for hers, and when Shane found her hand she clutched it tightly. There was something new, something Carmen had not known before, in her handclasp. She looked up and saw a young man walking towards the altar. He was tall and slender, and although dark bangs were covering his eyes, his emotions were still painfully visible. He seemed like a broken man.
‘He used to be so small… and chubby,’ Shane commented softly.
Carmen smiled weakly and glanced over at Shane, ‘He’s very handsome. He looks like you,’ she whispered gently. Charlie placed a framed picture of his wife on the coffin and made his way to the altar. Carmen reached up a little to get a good look of the picture and when she did, she felt waves of nausea wash over her. She sat back down and tried to take a deep breath, but her lungs weren’t letting her. ‘Are you okay?’ Shane asked worriedly. Carmen nodded, ‘Yes.. I’m fine,’ she spoke firmly, but her face was pale and her eyes motionless.
‘Are you sure?’ Shane asked, squeezing Carmen’s hand firmly.
Carmen closed her eyes, and felt her stomach churning. Suddenly her body was sweaty and cold, and all she wanted to do was get out of here. Out of this church, as fast as possible.
‘Shane? ..I-I need to get out of here.. Now.’