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Not The End, Chapter 38
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I look behind me and hear Tina talking to Shane.
“Tina, are you alright?” I say to her as I see her holding her hand.
“It was worth it.” She says to me.
“Ouch.” Kit says looking down at Kelly.
“Why did you do that, T?” I ask her.
“Because she deserved it Bette and you know she does.” She says looking into my eyes.
“You bitch..”
Our heads turn to look at Kelly standing to her feet.
I quickly step in front of her to block her from Tina.
“Look, both of you. Just stop.” I shout between the two of them.
“You are back together with her aren’t you?” She says looking at me while raising an eye brow.
I notice Tina walk away and back to the table with the girls.
“It’s none of your business.” I say looking at Kelly.
“You know what, Ms. Wentworth get yo ass on outta here, leave my club.” Kit cuts in.
I notice the look Kelly sways over my body before she turns and leaves through the door.
“What was that look about?” Kit says.
“I have a feeling it’s something thats for sure.” I say sighing.
“Tina is feeling anger too Bette and that showed it and maybe that finally released everything.”
“I know and I can’t blame her, I guess.”
“Can we forget about Kelly now? Because that woman is not worth running time over.”
“Yeah that I do know.”
“Now go over there with Tina, she’s having a hard time with Kelly too and what she just did, anyone would have done the same.”
I give a small smile. “You’re right.”
As I walk my way through the crowd my mind races through words.
And I realize things.
I realize Tina’s actions are for reasons that anybody would be going through, she did have a hard time and its understandable that from the past she believed things because she’s been through it before. I realize how much despise Tina had for Kelly and this tipped the boat for her, I noticed she had released anger tonight by the way her body looked like a brick had slipped off from her shoulder and for that I understand her action.
I return back to the table.
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Way to go Tina! Love she knocked Kelly on her ass. Loved it, thanks
TINA put the brakes on her without having to lay hands on the wanna be homewrecker.Totally possesive of BETTE and who better to find that out than KELLY WENTWORTH .A knock upside the head was what she needed and TINA delivered it with pleasure.Now watch your backs girls, the look KELLY gave BETTE means willing or unwilling i am gonna have you. A warning BETTE should heed.thanks pps
Tina rocks! That was one hell of a punch she gave Kelly.
But that look Kelly gave to Bette spells problems. Bette watch your back.
I am glad to read you are working at a new story!
Thanks for the feedback! :) and yes i am writing another story to share with you readers :)
Yes ! Tina Rousey slaughter Kelly, and was well
deserved that punch.
I await your new story.
The complete constellation.
Thank you for this post cant wait for more,, and happy to read you have another tbette story on the way.
Thanks :)
Victoria,
Often I refer back to this writer’s page on, “The Best Use of Dialogue Tags” when I begin to feel my scenes are getting off track, and not flowing the way I would like them to,
**I read your story, and like your enthusiasm for the characters, and the vibrancy with which you tell you it. Here are a few points that I have found helpful to remind myself of, even though I’ve read this page fifty times. Perhaps, you’ll find it of interest , as you engage your readers with your imaginative tales of our favorite show, and characters. Blackbird
Here’s an excerpt from the writer’s guide to dialogue tags, and issues and suggestions that I have remind myself of over and over:
•Don’t use dialogue tags that are physically impossible
Since you can’t laugh, smile, grin, growl, moan, a sentence, don’t use these words as dialogue tags.
Example:
Incorrect: “No way,” she laughed.
Correct: “No way.” She laughed.
• Don’t overuse dialogue tags
Not every line of dialogue needs a dialogue tag. If it’s already clear who’s talking, cut out the dialogue tag and let the dialogue stand on its own. In a conversation between two people, you can usually go for three exchanges without tags. In conversations between more people, you need more speaker attributions. THIS IS A GOOD ONE to check how over using tags will break your scene’s flow.
5) Replace some dialogue tags with action beats – Over and over again, I try to do this, and be mindful of the opportunities. It makes my writing so much better when I do this successfully.
• Instead of using a dialogue tag, action beats can also let readers know who’s talking. Action beats are sentences that describe the actions or body language of a character. Don’t use the same meaningless gestures all the time. Smiling, nodding, shrugging, sighing, or gazing at each other get repetitive after a while. Use action beats that are unique to the character and the situation.
Remember to use this one, especially: Action beats that show us subtext or contradict what the characters say are especially interesting.
Example:
“What makes you think I’m nervous?” She patted her pockets as if searching for a pack of cigarettes, even though she’d given up smoking weeks ago. “I’m the picture of cool, calm, and collected.”
• Avoid double attribution
Action beats and dialogue tags have the same purpose: letting readers know who’s talking. If you already used an action beat to identify the speaker, there’s no need to attach a dialogue tag the line of dialogue too. Use a tag or an action beat, not both.
Example:
Incorrect: “I hate broccoli,” Jill said, wrinkling her nose.
Incorrect: Jill wrinkled her nose. “I hate broccoli,” she said.
Correct: Jill wrinkled her nose. “I hate broccoli.”
•• Don’t delay dialogue tags too long
Get the dialogue tag in as early as possible in the sentence, so readers don’t have to wait to find out who’s talking.
Example:
Incorrect: “Damn. And here I thought we’d get some peace and quiet once all the trappers and emigrants headed west,” Charlie said.
Correct: “Damn,” Charlie said. “And here I thought we’d get some peace and quiet once all the trappers and emigrants headed west.”
8) Don’t describe the way someone speaks before he or she actually speaks
If you use introductory dialogue tags, you can end up describing the way a character speaks before he or she even says a word. Place the description of how a line of dialogue is spoken after the dialogue.
Example:
Incorrect: In a voice that sounded like nails scratching over a blackboard, she shouted, “Get back here!”
Correct: “Get back here!” she shouted in a voice that sounded like nails scratching over a blackboard.
________ Again, nice job. Hope this helps.
Blackbird
Thanks so much Blackbird, I appreciate this :)