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    Oh Deer

    “…we will lose millions if we don’t get someone up there to fix it. MILLIONS!”

    “I’ll go,” Tina heard herself saying.

    “What!” Bill yelled.

    “I’ll go. I will make sure this movie is our best one yet.”

    “Our best one yet?” Bill scoffed. “Tina…”

    “Bill, you just said we’re losing millions. We both know it has to be me,” Tina said challenging him.

    Bill’s eyes looked around the room. Scanning each producer. No one had the abilities that Tina possessed. She had a calming energy about her. She got people to do things they wouldn’t otherwise do. All of the crews she’d worked with loved her. They would happily put in 20-hour days because Tina asked them to. She was right. If they had any chance of salvaging this movie, it had to be her.

    “You’d have to be on set every day. New locations have to be scouted. Permits obtained. It could take months. It’s a fucking mess.” Bill said softer.

    “Understood.”

    “When can you leave?”

    “I’ll have Liz book me on a flight tomorrow afternoon.”

    “Tina…”

    “Save it, Bill. We will discuss my bonus and partnership after this becomes our highest grossing movie to date.”

    “Partnership?”

    “Partnership, Bill,” Tina said straightforwardly.

    Bill nodded.

    The studio put Tina up in a magnificent apartment. Gorgeous views. Two bedrooms. Lots of space. As inviting as it should have been, Tina hated it. It was too big. Too empty. Too consuming. Too…without Bette. The first time she walked through the doors, she stood in the middle of the room and couldn’t believe she was actually there. She took a deep breath and as she exhaled the weight of what she’d done came crashing down on her all at once. Luckily, there was a lot of work to do and Tina knew she wouldn’t have to spend much time in the apartment at all. Only to sleep. Hopefully.

    Bill was right. It was an absolute mess. Lots of heated discussions. Lots of handholding. Lots of ego stroking. Tina was clocking 80-90 hours each week. She didn’t mind but the coddling made her want to vomit. Tina knew that part was necessary to establish her presence and her authority. She craved the work. She needed the work.

    She fell into a routine which helped keep her mind occupied. Quick run in the mornings. She was always first on set. Then the crew meeting to go over the plan for the day. When it was finally time for her to leave for the night, she’d pick up some food. Lucky for Tina, Vancouver had amazing eateries and she had several options between the set and the apartment. Then she’d pour a glass of wine, go over the notes from the day and review what needed to be done for the next day. Her goal was to exhaust herself so that she could chase the thoughts that haunted her away.

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