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Remember Who You are 37
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The pieces started to slide together. The comments made over the years, the way Lucy’s birth was cause for such celebration, why Tina was always in trouble, never felt the love from Donna, why Donna was always worried Tina didn’t fit in, would embarrass her.
“Why would she want me back then? Why the big production on our front lawn to have me come home?”
Tina’s voice was small, all the life had gone out of her. Completely deflated, like a birthday balloon the day after a party.
She raised her head to look at her father, her eyes showing her shock, her hurt.
“She wanted your money Darling. And your connections. She was looking to break into the drug business in LA, big time. She thought you were her ticket to the movie stars. She… she had a hard time loving you, loving Lucy even. A hard time.”
“All those years, Pop. All those years… you let her… you knew… and you let her…”
“Yes. I never got over losing Louise. I am ashamed of how I didn’t do right by you. But Donna threatened to tell everyone you weren’t her blood and Boo made me swear on Louise’s grave that I would raise you as a townie and not a river girl. A true Kennard, not a Hager. And I loved you, Tina. I still love you. I didn’t know what else to do…”
Tina sunk to the floor, her head in her hands, rocking. There were no tears, no outbursts, just the silent reflection of a young woman who never felt at ease in her own home and was just now finding out why.
And big Tom, for all his size and the ravages of his illness, did not hesitate to get down on the floor with his daughter to hold her, providing whatever comfort he could to soften the blow of his news.
Tina crumpled into his arms; her face buried in his chest as he talked low in her ear. It was too quiet for the microphones to pick up their words, but Bette could see Tina’s head nodding and after a long while, Tina’s arms crept up to hug him back.
Bette realized tears were coming down her face as she watched her wife on the screen have a quiet, whispered conversation with a complicated man who disappointed and shone bright at the same time.
A long time later, Tina looked up to where she thought the camera was. She looked for Bette to see her in the other house and nodded slowly.
“Get her out.” Bette said, “Get her the fuck out now…”
The agent was already out the door.
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Oh my! What a chapter. I am going to sleep on this and read it again tomorrow! I did not see that coming.
I usually read chapters twice too,… thanks for sticking with this one!
Well, damn, BK! I never saw this coming. Nice curveball. Keep up the good work.
Thank you Deanna! Glad you are liking the story. Hope all is well –
BK
BK,
I loved this rabbit trail to explain Tom . . . . But man did U hit me with a wet fish!! 😳😳😳. I didn’t see it comin’ at all that Donna WASN’T Tina’s Mom!!!!😶😮😲. Donna had always been resentful toward Tom as well and she clearly never let him forget his infidelity and the child (Tina) the result of that indescretion. Damn!!
So I wonder if Tina is thinking of having Tom live out his remaining months with she & Bette?🤔. We love you dearly BK even though U’ve tossed many curveballs, but now we see the old screw ball too, eh??
We need to stay very diligent with U bc it won’t be long ‘til U’re throw the “high heater, inside, tight😳😝
High Heater inside, tight…LOL this comment is life.
Curveballs, screwballs and wet fish… those are hilarious responses to this chapter. What would I ever do without you DT? Thanks for making my day….
Well!! Aren’t you full of surprises!
Just you get back here are post the next Chapter!
SG
On it SassyG on it :)
I have now completed a full re-read and am waiting, not very patiently, for the next Chapter in this compelling story.
Thanks for sharing your talent with us.
SG
Wow…. I sure am glad that Tina insisted on seeing Donna one more time! Look what Tina and Bette would have missed if they had simply thrown Donna and Tom out in that meeting at the beach house and decided never to have any contact with them again. An a amazing set of facts which would never have come to their attention.
This is a lot of information for Tina and Bette to absorb. But for the most part they have answers and they have closure. Since Donna and Tom are both in protective custody of the government, the government probably have pending charges ready to arrest the two of them take them into regular custody and start the legal process. If they do not have Donna’s computer at home, they should get it as it will have all the transactional history, communications and other information they will need to get all the details to shut down the entire operation. Tina could not have done any better than what she did.
I wonder what the conversation was between Tom and Tina that was out of range of the microphones? I believe that Tom truly loved his daughters Tina and Lucy. But he failed as a father. Donna was just pure evil. Perhaps Lucy is the heir apparent to Donna to her drug business? Perhaps that is who was running the LA operation for Eric? I makes sense why Donna didn’t care what Eric did to Tina. Tina was no more than an asset to be sold to the highest bidder. After all, she was not her child.
This is an amazing story – I am in awe of how well this all dove tails together. Thank you for getting my question form my comments answered. What reason would Donna have to get her back to North Carolina for in the first place. She had been out of the home for ten years. Answer: She wanted her money, her contacts in the movie industry. Comment: Not a very effective way of making that happen.
Thanks for this chapter… Terrific…. Love it.
You are exactly right….Tom did fail as a father… but hoped to make it up to Tina as he saw his own days dwindling. Glad you liked it Martha, I love reading your comments….
Martha,
Your paragraph about Lucy being groomed as heir apparent by Mom may really be right on. Had wondered how Lucy has been surviving all the years that she’s been away from home. Your comment about how Donna didn’t seem to have “any prob” with Tina being used and abused by Eric now make sense. Not my daughter so for sure I dont give a flip was the internal dialog of that dreadful woman
Wow Bk, what a turn of the events!
But i want to point out this sentence firtst, i quote: “I should have told you” Tina repeated, her voice soft, contrite. “I don’t know why I didn’t.”
Bette searched the cornflower eyes, noticed the bags under Tina’s eyes, the tightening around her lips, the strain of the last few months visible if you knew where to look. She angled her own body to face Tina.
“You don’t know why, that’s all I hear lately. You don’t know why. I’ll tell you one why… we need to be talking. About everything. Because when we don’t… we fall apart. That’s one very important why.”
Bette is spot on, if they fail to communicate again, they will fall apart again. Tina admits that she falls into old behavior, nice that she sees it herself and does her best to prevent it and leans on Bette for support. Of course, so much has happened in recent months that I can understand that Tina has turned in on herself, this. all must be very hard on her, but luckily there is Bette who at all costs wants to prevent both from growing apart by the same mistakes from the past.
For the rest of my comments I would like to join Martha, she has expressed exactly what I wanted to say or know.
What a total surprise this chapter, I did not expect it and I hope you can post another chapter soon!
Thank you BiBi
There has been a lot that has happened to Tina now that I think about it. Like one big soap opera… I should have called it As the World Turns…. girlfriend needs a break!
Now that was quite the bomb you dropped, BK! Incredible. Here I thought this story couldn’t get any better but you upped the ante. Why would you think we wouldn’t like how the plot is developing? Like Deanna wrote: nice curveball. Love love love it.
But first of all the conversation in the airplane was so needed. I really hope that Tina will reflect more on what Bette brought up. Now that there was another package put on top of it all. Bette needs to adress her fears as well. Tina was right to mention her recurring nightmares.
Like Tina I loved how Bette confronted Agent Davis. He seemed blasé about Tina, an untrained civilian, probably risking her life by visiting the caged in Dragon Donna. Although he earned a few Brownie points when he put the other agents in their place while Tina was doing an agent’s work.
Finally Tom stood up and showed that there is at least one decent bone in his body. What a revelation! And what great news that Tina is related to Boo Hager. She won’t have to worry that she inherited any of Donna’s malicious traits. Wow, I see huge progress for Tina’s therapy. So many thing about her childhood and her character become clearer. Yes, it’s sad that she missed out on having a loving environment with Donna not accepting her and Tom seldomly being available. But at least she had family in Boo. I hope we get to read more of Tina’s memories of her. And get to hear together with Bette what was spoken between daughter and father.
I loved that moment on the floor. A much needed bonding for Tina.
Now to the questioning. I doubt that only Tom was able to suss out the set up and notice the agents next door. I bet Donna was playing games again. Was she trying to shift more focus an Eric? Telling about the LA warehouse and office? I worry for Tina’s safety. Please have her out of the house quickly before Donna pulls a stunt and tries to kill Tom and Tina. She’ll be on edge. Caged animal and all.
What a chapter, BK! Thanks for making my Sunday.
Please enjoy yours and don’t let all those negative news wear you down. Cheer up!
KP
KP
I thought the conversation on the plane was huge too, and I think Bette has a lot more to say. I am looking forward to writing more about ole Boo, something about her is very intriguing and I think there is more to her and Tina’s story. Thanks for your comments, very encouraging. Planning a quiet, easy day tomorrow and hope you have a great last week in May. June is around the corner and hopefully things will start to turn around. Thank you KP
Like everyone else, shocked at Tom’s revelation!!! That could mean so much for Tina’s entire mind set & emotions. Donna needs to go down in a BIG way!!!!
Tina is goi ng to need Bette so much now. Hope she will let Bette in.
They need to keep communicating or face damage to their relationship.
A great story & now keeping us guessing!!!!
Thanks so much & looking forward to more!!!
Thank you Collins, appreciate your comments and you know I love your story as well.
Tina will need Bette you are so right, hope she lets her in :)
BK,
Is your Boo Hager character an inspiration from the Boo Radley character in To Kill a Mockingbird? That sole who lives on the edge of society who is perceived to be off mentally and behaviorally for whatever reason. That person who become the protector and in some respects saves the day in an important event. Your Boo is essential to your story…. you deserve an award for this character alone. But you have so much more.
I would think that the childhood Tina had a personality a lot like Scout. Story lines are completely different but sense of curiosity and independence certainly are similar. Both had an adoration of their father, even though Tina’s may not have justified. In the eyes of a child, who their parents are is all they know of what parenting is until you get older and see different examples and notice that perhaps not everyone has Mom who is not interested in your well being.
Martha
What a fantastic question. I love To Kill A Mockingbird, I actually have a signed copy and came very close to meeting Harper Lee before she died in 2016/2017 at an art festival in Monroeville, Alabama. It is a wonderful book but I did not have her in mind when I wrote about Tina’s Boo. At least not consciously :)
This may sound weird but Boo Hager just popped up when I was writing. I knew I wanted someone in Tina’s life who showed her how to be kind, to be sweet and who gave her a different experience than what she lived through with Donna. Someone who helped shape who she became.
Tom offered or tried to offer respite when he could. But his approach was more functional – showing her how to change the oil, fix things, build birdhouses. He spent time with her to get her away from Donna but I felt she need nurturing, someone who understood her – by taking the time to understand her.
I have always loved the idea of the recluse – like you said, the person on the edge of society who is mistrusted or disliked but has hidden gifts that come out when the right relationship is developed. I totally see a young Tina as a Scout – or as the character in Fried Green Tomatoes when she little (can’t remember her name). A tough, tom boy type of little girl who finds peace in the outdoors and the water that she can’t find at home. So glad you saw that too. And you are right, Tina def adored her father despite his inability to protect her from everything.
Thank you so much for this sidebar into this story and the characters. It has been an absolute joy to write.
BK
Wow, BK. You pulled out all the stops for this one, didn’t you? Lots of information to process in this chapter. Will Bette and Tina ever get their happy ending? LOL!
Looking forward to them reconnecting.
I am very grateful for your help, seriously. Got in a little over my head there a few times. :)) thanks
Please don’t let this story disappear. Too many times wonderful stories are started and then never finished. Waiting for more.
“Tina’s voice was small, all the life had gone out of her. Completely deflated, like a birthday balloon the day after a party.”
Oh, my, don’t I know that kind of awful feeling you just so rightly depicted in one sentence… I still feel this way – too often for my good…
Your story is so powerful, I’m amazed. Really, I am. All the possible levels of emotions, like a palette of infinite colours… I love it so much.
Thank you, once more and never too much, for sharing…
A.