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    The Settlement 26.6

    Still attracted to the vicinity of where the gentle sound originated, Tina asked what had pressed on her mind since uncovering the liaison.  “If I didn’t see you together, would you have kept your relationship with her?”

    Bette let pass the reference to it being more than what it was for her.  It was an affair of no consequence.  A fling.  Not anything she would deem a relationship connoting a bond shared, more than just a base physical one.  Such as that she shared with the woman who now turned to meet her gaze.  The glassy hazel eyes that stared back at her were tinged with a shade of dismay.

    “Of course you could question it.”  Bette sighed with regret.  Disappointed that her act would perhaps forever imprint doubt on whatever she said or did.  ”But I truly believe I would have ended it.”

    “You must be thinking that you’ll never know for certain.  What do you have to rely on but my word?  Having hurt you – having kept so much from you before I don’t know if you’ll believe me.”  

    “But I’m asking you to.  Right now I’m asking that of you.”

    Qualification in place, the message was restated, “I know this sounds empty and hope you understand but when I was with her…I felt so removed from the idea of my being with her.”

    Tina frowned.  Though meant in another context, she opted for the simpler interpretation.  With her.  With another physically. Intimately. Experiencing a physical euphoria that was inevitable in the act itself regardless of deeper feeling. Grimacing, the insecurity in Bette’s betrayal pleaded to be assuaged once more.

    “I didn’t want you to love anyone else.”

    “I didn’t,” quickly Bette emphasized with a set jaw. The certainty and sincerity in the retort was absolute.  “I failed you.  I failed myself.” 

    “Please believe me.”  She sighed heavily, “I never loved her." 

    "She wasn’t you,” Bette whispered.

    Although marked with a hint of defeat from the unease that found roots in her heart, Tina sighed in acceptance.  Reaching to capture the golden tresses that fell across her face, her fingers moved to tuck them behind her right ear.  Then she amended softly, “I didn’t want you to touch anyone else.”

    “Tina I’m sorry.”  Pained loneliness characterized the darker haired woman’s words. 

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    Comments

    1. So glad to see you writing again. The only way I can find to describe your writing is that it’s like a connoisseur’s choice, if that makes any sense. Every word seems to be carefully selected and placed for optimum effect. To me it seems carefully crafted and as a result is an absolute pleasure to read. Thanks for writing and so happy to see you back.

    2. Glad that life allowed you time to update. Sometimes you get blind sided and it takes awhile to get back onto your feet. I missed this story, but as a Tibetter I hope that they can work passed the hurt and welcome each other back into one anothers lives.

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