“It’s true though and you’re invited to my oath taking ceremony as I proclaim allegiance to their kind.” Expelling a breath audibly, I continued,  “Self-deprecating humor aside, I just truly want her to be happy and if it translates to me letting go…”

Waving my hand for effect, “It’s not in the cards so to speak – her and me.”

Shaking my head coupled with yet another frustrated breath I continued, “*****, she’s not even mine to let go of you know?”  Recollecting myself, I forged on, “Well what I mean to say is if I can give her a sense of freedom…no awkwardness, a comfortable air, our being friends, or my supporting her current and or future relationships then so be it.”  

My comments regarding potential relationships were fueled by the memory of a recent acquaintance.  What I neglected to mention to Dana earlier regarding the fundraising dinner where I had the conversation with Richard Thompson from the country club was that Helena and I had a chance to talk. 
 
Helena had accompanied her colleague of sorts, Nicole Mulligan, a friend and staunch supporter of the CAC.  One the gallery could not afford to ignore.  They had arrived half an hour into the pre-dinner festivities.  Of course, my luck dictated that Franklin was unavailable to greet them and I was relegated to welcoming duty. 
 
To be honest I tried to extricate myself from their company as soon as politely allowed.  However, the conversation seemed to stretch endlessly into tangents that were actually quite interesting and engaging.  Soon thereafter, my discomfort amplified related to how confident and genuine a person she was as opposed to the idea of her being with Tina and the natural dislike that truth fostered.
 
Why I ever thought or hoped she would be otherwise is mind twisting.  Tina would never want to share time with someone who wasn’t deserving of her attention.  Someone who was caring and open-minded to making life more fulfilling for surrounding souls.  So I guess I could at least take that as a compliment.  The fact that she was with me I mean. 
 
But that, in turn, applies to Helena as well.  Now, after the time spent together, I couldn’t contest the reality even with just the limited exposure to this woman.